Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇸 has downloaded:

If I’m ever in a coma, please pluck my chin hairs.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has bookmarked:

I hope you celebrate your birthday like your birth – naked and screaming.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has viewed:

I hate it when I gain 20 pounds for a role and then realize I’m not an actor.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has downloaded:

This post is highly top-secret. You need to forget that you’ve seen it immediately.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has copied:

Relationship status: my last pickpocket had really gentle hands.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has viewed:

If they stole your post, they probably need it more than you do.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has bookmarked:

Nothing ruins your weekend faster than remembering Monday is lurking in the shadows.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has copied:

I wasn’t sure why the doctor prescribed LSD for my constipation, until I saw a dragon and shit myself.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has downloaded:

I’ve deleted enough tweets to know that I should never get a tattoo.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has shared:

My favorite part of socializing is when it’s over.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,290

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Pinterest:

Even before the internet, I always had a little side chat going on in my head.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

People call me a “Trekkie,” but I’m not. I’ve only seen Star Wars a couple of times.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Yesterday, I went to the grocery store, and I managed to come home without any junk food. Now, I’m mad that we don’t have any junk food.

Trending via Snapchat:

Rich people don’t put their couches against their wall. I moved my couch into the middle of the floor and still haven’t gotten rich. I don’t know what I’m doing wrong here.

Going bananas on YouTube:

You want me to pay attention to the details? The thing the devil is in?

Freshly posted on Messenger:

The lion does not concern himself at all. The lion is depressed.

Trending via Telegram:

Overheard a baby crying in the grocery store the other day so I went over and joined him. I get it, little dude, life is hard.

Shared recently on X:

Just stay single, y’all… I’m here apologizing for taking a nap.

Breaking via TikTok:

If the shampoo and the conditioner finish at the same time, one of them faked it.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

I suppose someone has to do all the consuming and obeying.

Funny hip-hop quotes

Funny hip-hop quotes bring the beats 🎤 and laughs 😂 together, turning iconic lines into pure entertainment! Whether you’re a rap fan or just love clever wordplay 🎧, these witty gems will have you grinning from ear to ear 😎. Get ready to vibe with some hilarious bars that remix culture and comedy like never before! 🎶🔥

New funny hip-hop quotes 👇

All funny hip-hop quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

19 shares on X this month:

“Apple Music has better sound quality!” Okay, but my entire life is on Spotify, my playlists are my children.

13 shares on Reddit this month:

My morning routine is basically just me convincing myself not to go back to bed.

94 shares on Threads this month:

Sometimes I’ll do a random act of kindness, like keeping my mouth shut, for example.

54 shares on Messenger this month:

I would like to opt out of WW3, por favor.

51 shares on Snapchat this month:

What many call beauty can just be wiped off 90% of the time.

62 shares on Discord this month:

Why have abs when you can have kebabs?

95 shares on Messenger this month:

Your honor, if it pleases the court, here’s Wonderwall.

10 shares on WeChat this month:

When is a robot gonna take over my job? Please?

22 shares on Snapchat this month:

“Kiss From a Rose” makes you think Batman Forever is the most romantic movie ever made.

34 shares on Reddit this month:

Starting to think business is standing on me.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Adulthood means trying to convince yourself that the font is just too small and that it isn’t your eyesight going bad.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

I use karate strictly as a last resort, after I’ve exhausted fleeing and screaming.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Strange new trend at the office. People putting names on food in the company fridge. Today I had a tuna sandwich named Linda.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Just saw someone my age running and she wasn’t chasing an ice-cream truck.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

I don’t expect everything handed to me, just set it down outside my door.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

The longest and most adventurous journeys begin with the words: “I know a shortcut.”

12 folks are currently checking 👀

That awkward moment when you try something on in a shop but you don’t know if you can get it off again.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

There should be guide dogs that prevent you from making bad decisions.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Me to cat: quit looking at me like I’m an ingredient.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

D was probably like “lmao ok” when they named the alphabet the ABCs

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,485

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇫🇲 has copied:

It’s never too early to be sad about having to work the next day.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has viewed:

This too shall pass. And then some other bullshit will come and take its place. It never fucking ends.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has bookmarked:

If the zombie apocalypse happens we’re double screwed because there are millions on record as having no brain.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has viewed:

11:00 am – Anything is possible. 3:00 pm – But not today.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has copied:

Reading fanfics is so fun, I wish romantic attraction was real.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has shared:

I’m so old and have never even met a woman named Jolene. I’d really like to find her, though. She can have my man.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has downloaded:

Today’s book recommendation: “The Art of Silence” by the famous Chinese philosopher Shut-Up.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has copied:

I’m currently on a really effective diet called “I only have twenty dollars until payday”.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has viewed:

The nerve of a majority of people I meet being younger than me. How dare them?

Someone from 🇶🇦 has downloaded:

Eating Chinese takeout is never as depressing as in the movies. It usually is good.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Reddit:

Parenting a teenager is surreal because you’ll be sitting there, and some dude who is much taller than you will walk around the corner and ask you how to open a popcorn bag.

Going viral on Twitch:

Welcome to your 40s, the best part of your day is now the heated seats in your car after a long day.

Just shared via TikTok:

If you’re offended by bacon, the United States of America isn’t for you.

Going viral on Reddit:

If you inject Botox into a raisin, does it turn back into a grape?

Shared recently on Twitch:

I made a smoothie that needs a spoon.

Spotted on X:

Marriage! Because your shitty day doesn’t have to end at work.

Going viral on TikTok:

If you call me from a private number, I’ll respect your privacy and won’t answer.

Seen just now on Messenger:

I wish pets lived longer, and life wasn’t so expensive, and cake didn’t make you fat, and people weren’t twats.

Shared recently on Twitch:

You don’t need to be a good listener as long as you’re a good nodder.

Going bananas on X:

I feel like I’ve skipped the whole ‘go out and have fun’ stage and went straight to being an 80-year-old woman.

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