Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇦 has bookmarked:

Accidentally clicked a post about UFOs, and now my Facebook algorithm thinks I’m a much different person.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has viewed:

My robot vacuum and I are cut from the same cloth. When we see a line of dirt on the kitchen floor, we just spin around and go the other way.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has shared:

They should invent a word for when you’re alive but not really living.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has copied:

No revenge, because losing someone like me is enough.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has downloaded:

My favorite thing about summer is opening a window for 30 seconds so an insect that hasn’t been identified by science yet can fly into your home.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has bookmarked:

Oh, you’re in a situationship? Which one are you, the liar or the loser?

Someone from 🇩🇲 has copied:

Tomorrow isn’t promised, so eat that cake today.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has shared:

If parallel universe exist, I hope the other me is doing well.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has bookmarked:

Had calamari for the first time ever, and it wasn’t that bad. Maybe I’ll try marriage next.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has downloaded:

The whole “read before you go to bed to get sleepy” thing does not apply to me because I will be up till 5 a.m. if the book is worth it.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

216 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,485

Funny Quotes Topics

17,557

Funny Quotes Images

15,485

Updated

Jan 5, 2026

Users Online

3,387

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Discord:

Diet tip: Your pants can’t get too tight if you never wear any.

Just landed via Instagram:

Who you are when you’re stuck behind a slow driver is the real you.

Broadcasted on TikTok:

Santa: “Don’t leave me milk. Leave me whiskey.”

Broadcasted on YouTube:

So annoying when your family knocks on the toilet door and asks what you’re doing. I’m baking a cake. HBU?

Spreading quickly via Discord:

I swear, one more minor inconvenience and I’m running away to join the circus.

Going bananas on LinkedIn:

A DM? Flirt on the timeline like a real man.

Shared recently on Instagram:

It’s so hot the chipmunks are using my bird bath as a hot tub and requesting mimosas and the brunch menu.

Going viral on TikTok:

She was rare. Like a meth head with good teeth.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

She was unique, like a millennial that could drive a stick shift.

Live now on Slack:

Maybe the grass is greener over there because you’re not over there messing it up.

Funny impressive quotes

Funny impressive quotes bring laughter and wisdom together in the most unexpected ways 😂💡. They’re perfect for brightening your day, sparking conversations, and impressing your friends with clever wit 😎✨. Whether you need a quick mood boost or a clever comeback, these gems have got you covered! Ready to dive into a world where humor meets brilliance? Let’s get giggling and inspiring! 🎉🔥

New funny impressive quotes 👇

All funny impressive quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

73 shares on Pinterest this month:

I hate when teachers put “?” on my work, like I don’t know either.

89 shares on X this month:

I wish British people had subtitles so I knew what they are on about.

71 shares on WeChat this month:

My dating era has come to an end. I’d like to thank those who participated.

23 shares on YouTube this month:

Whoever coined the term coined the term coined the term coined the term.

75 shares on YouTube this month:

Nice tweets, bro. What medications are you on?

85 shares on Discord this month:

Need a professional way to say, “I do not care, don’t mention this to me again.”

40 shares on TikTok this month:

Ground beef implies the existence of sky beef.

65 shares on WeChat this month:

What career is most compatible with the unemployed lifestyle?

16 shares on Messenger this month:

I love when someone is like “I’m funny because I have trauma and it’s a coping mechanism” and it’s like “Okay, not to add to your trauma, but you’re not funny!”

31 shares on Messenger this month:

I hate it when some random company refers to me as their “customer.” I’m like, look, we had one night of drunken shopping, we are not in a relationship.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

13 folks are currently checking 👀

My ego is bruised so I’m going to ice it with some cold beer.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Why do fruit flies be everywhere but at the supermarket? Ain’t that like their Golden Corral?

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Sometimes I think I should talk to my colleagues more often. Until I talk to my colleagues.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

“Do what you love and you’ll never work a day in your life.” Yeah, because I won’t be leaving my bed.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

My wife didn’t order anything from Amazon yesterday, so the driver gave us a knock this morning to make sure we were OK.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Apartments show you 44 pics of the lobby. Man, I ain’t living in there.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

One of the most disappointing things is when you get a severe thunderstorm warning, and there is no severe thunderstorm.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

My unemployed neighbor with an unlimited firework budget would like to wish everyone a happy 9th of July.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

If “live each day as if it’s your last” means being paralyzed with anxiety and a sense of impending doom, then I am absolutely nailing it.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Growing your own tomatoes really is the best way to devote 3 months of your life to saving $2.17.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

216 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,485

Funny Quotes Topics

17,557

Funny Quotes Images

15,485

Updated

Jan 5, 2026

Users Online

3,252

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇦 has copied:

Forever grateful that thought bubbles aren’t a real thing.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has bookmarked:

I asked my boyfriend if he believed in trolls and elves and he said, “slightly.”

Someone from 🇬🇶 has bookmarked:

I’ve been on Facebook for so long, I remember when it all used to be farmland.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has downloaded:

After I drink coffee, I show my empty cup to the IT guy and say that I have successfully installed Java. He hates me.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has downloaded:

When I say I’m Christmas shopping the “for myself” is silent.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has shared:

Brussels sprouts were invented by big cabbage to sell little cabbages.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has bookmarked:

With a lollipop in one hand and a dandelion in the other, concentration is very important, as every summer child knows.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has bookmarked:

Shy with a mean resting face is a crazy combo.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has shared:

Once I shot a man with a paintball gun, just to watch him dye.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has bookmarked:

It’s funny how quickly you become difficult if you don’t always just say “yes”.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Messenger:

The worst thing about having children is the parents of the other children.

Seen just now on WeChat:

People in glass houses shouldn’t throw orgies.

Just landed via Discord:

If I climbed all the way to the top of Mount Everest and looked up, then I’d finally see the top of our family’s weekly laundry pile.

Trending via Instagram:

Grok, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.

Spotted on WeChat:

I want Al to do my laundry and dishes so that I can do art and writing, not for Al to do my art and writing so that I can do my laundry and dishes.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

I alway get the same thing every year for Christmas. Fat!

Broadcasted on X:

The title of my autobiography is going to be ‘You’d Think I’d Learn By Now, But Nope.’

Spotted on Pinterest:

What if they close grocery stores and we have to hunt for our food? I don’t even know where the little gummy bears live.

Breaking via Snapchat:

It’s crazy I need a certificate to prove I was born when you can literally just look at me.

Just landed via Facebook:

Have you tried making guacamole about it?

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