188 Funny job quotes

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: I like how the Tooth Fairy got the job, and then subbed it out to everyone’s parents. That’s called “business savvy.”

  Commentary:
  "Who knew the Tooth Fairy was such a clever entrepreneur, outsourcing those tooth-collecting duties like a true boss 💼✨ Parental tooth-fairy assistants, reporting for duty! 💁‍♂️💁‍♀️ #ToothFairyInc"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: Worst part of a corporate job is no tips. Someone should slip you a $20 if you write a killer email.

  Commentary:
  "Really, where's the extra incentive for drafting those *fire* emails, right? 💸💻 Who knew that a few dollar bills could make email chains more thrilling than a spy mission? 🔥💼 #TipMeIfYouLikeMyEmails"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: I’m not a good fit for the traditional job market because my greatest strengths are challenging authority, being self-righteous, and wanting to go home.

  Commentary:
  "Who needs a traditional job when you have a winning combo of instigating rebellion, being a self-righteous maverick, and daydreaming about Netflix marathons? 🤣🙌 You're like a non-conformist superhero fighting the forces of corporate boredom! 💥 #NotYourAverageEmployee"

  Fun Fact or Trivia:
  Did you know that some of the most successful entrepreneurs and innovators often thrive outside of traditional job structures? 🌟 They embrace their unique strengths and perspectives, turning them into powerful tools for creativity and independence! 🚀💼 Many of these individuals prioritize flexibility and autonomy, allowing them to challenge the status quo and pursue their passions. 🏠✨

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: The worst thing I’ve seen as a paramedic is my paycheck.

  Commentary:
  Seeing a paycheck after a tough day be like: "Is this a joke or a cry for help? 🤦‍♂️💸" Remember, laughter is the best medicine – unfortunately, it doesn't pay the bills!

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: Cover letters are so embarrassing. Why am I writing a love letter to this shitty company?

  Commentary:
  "Trying to woo a job like 💌❤️: Dear Hiring Manager, your company is the one I've been dreaming of since I was a little résumé. 🤣🧡 #jobsearchwoes"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: I wish I was a cat. No bills, no job, just meow, meow.

  Commentary:
  "If only life were as simple as being a cat – no bills, no job, just endless meow-sic and cat naps! 🐱💤 Who wouldn't want to spend their days purr-suing the ultimate relaxation goals? 😄 #MeowLife"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: The biggest problem with finding another job is I don’t want one.

  Commentary:
  "Trying to find a new job when you're already happily employed is like trying to find a better meal after devouring a delicious feast…why ruin a good thing? 🍔😅 #FirstWorldProblems"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: Yeah, I can explain that gap on my resume, I tried to move a picture in Word.

  Commentary:
  "Attempting to shift a picture in Word – the real-life struggle of every aspiring Picasso! 🎨💼 Who knew such a simple task could result in a career gap? 🤷‍♂️😂 #WordWoes"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: I noticed my mouse problem is back an I yelled at my cats for being lazy and not doing their job, like I was in a Tom and Jerry cartoon.

  Commentary:
  Looks like we've got a real-life Tom and Jerry situation on our hands! 🐭🐱 Who knew cats had unionized and are now protesting against their job descriptions? 🙀 Time to call in the cat union rep for some serious negotiations! 😹 #LazyCatsAnonymous

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: Thinking about stepping down from being an adult, I’m just not in the right headspace for this position right now. I really appreciate the opportunity though.

  Commentary:
  "Considering a demotion from being an adult; my current mental state is more suited for the role of Chief Napper 😴. Grateful for the chance to adult, but these responsibilities need a timeout. 🚫🧠 #AdultingCanWait"

For even more funny job quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny job quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌