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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇴 has copied:

Always remember you’re someone’s reason to smile. Because you’re a joke.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has shared:

No one my age is single because they’re all unhappily married.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has viewed:

One thing that could really “level-up” the experience of being a pedestrian would be if cars had some kind of feature that could indicate whether or not they were going to turn in a particular direction.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has downloaded:

Today is the Mondayest Thursday that has ever been mistaken for a Friday in the history of Wednesdays.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has downloaded:

Do the people who make chairs know what humans look like, or nah?

Someone from 🇺🇾 has shared:

How dare you? I’m literally the sweetest most rage filled person on earth.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has shared:

I would rather lose you than the argument.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has downloaded:

The only constant in my life are the accidental screenshots of my lock screen.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has viewed:

Do you mind if I become the object of your desire? No worries if not.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has downloaded:

Having a job ruined my life.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

800 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,962

Funny Quotes Topics

13,930

Funny Quotes Images

10,962

Updated

60 minutes ago

Users Online

3,426

Social Media Log 💫

Reported on YouTube:

Celebrating President’s Day by not doing anything I promised I would.

Just landed via X:

They say you should dress for the job you want then send you home as “the stormtrooper suit is not appropriate work attire”.

Live now on Slack:

Are you bad wifi, cause im feeling no connection here.

Seen just now on Telegram:

Being skinny may be nice, but chicken nuggets are even nicer.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

Another beautiful day without using sin, tan and cos.

Reported on Threads:

I love it when my dog suddenly gets up and goes to another part of the house. Did you just remember you left the stove on or something?

Breaking via WhatsApp:

I was talking to someone and combined “all good” and “no worries” by saying “all worries”, which was a lot more accurate.

Spotted on Threads:

Why can’t you just be happy for me and then go home and talk behind my back later like a normal person?

Live now on WeChat:

Can we normalize arguing with little kids? They’re so rude.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

I have 206 bones, 650 muscles and 50 billion cells in my body. It takes time to wake up all of them up in the morning.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

800 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,962

Funny Quotes Topics

13,930

Funny Quotes Images

10,962

Updated

60 minutes ago

Users Online

3,438

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇦 has shared:

That awkward moment when you’ve said “What?” three times, so you just say “Oh, yeah..” even though you have no idea what they said.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has downloaded:

I started my diet 2 hours ago, I’m glad that’s over.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has bookmarked:

Unless you’re dead wearing a sheet, you got no business ghosting people.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has bookmarked:

I’m so lazy that I get jealous when it’s bedtime in other countries.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has bookmarked:

French fries are like the lifeboats on the Titanic. They never give you enough.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has shared:

You ever met someone so dumb you gotta take a deep breath before responding to them?

Someone from 🇨🇻 has downloaded:

Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has viewed:

Feeling melancholy. Think I’ll have a drink and make things much worse.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has bookmarked:

Me, first week as a volunteer firefighter thinking we only rescue cats: We’re going where?

Someone from 🇰🇿 has copied:

They should make a separate airport for people who know how to act like they’ve been out in public before.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Discord:

Most people think that I’m arrogant, but who cares what peasants think.

Broadcasted on Telegram:

If I ever look at my phone in the middle of a conversation with you, I’m not reading a text; I’m just looking up the definition of a word I just used a bit too confidently.

Just landed via Discord:

I hurt my bottom after shaking it at the office party. It was a twerk-place injury.

Broadcasted on Slack:

That song stuck in my head is “Don’t Speak”; I have no doubt in my mind.

Making waves on Instagram:

JFK is the perfect name for this airport because it’s a bloody headache.

Shared recently on Threads:

Anyone know how to get an air guitar out of a vacuum?

Live now on LinkedIn:

If you’re worried that you added too much cheese to the recipe, I am here to reassure you that you did not.

Live now on Snapchat:

When I was a kid my parents moved a lot, but I always found them.

Going viral on X:

The sexual tension when everyone arrives at a 4-way stop at the same time.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Brave of you to assume you can resist my good looks.

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