Wordgag ツ

Jan 21, 2025
Share →: You unfollow me because you are afraid of falling in love with me. I know!

Commentary:
Oh, is that why you unfollowed me? 😏 Don't worry, falling in love with me is a risk worth taking 😜💔 #UnfollowedButNotUnloved
Jan 21, 2025
Share →: Instead of getting married again, I’m going to find a woman I don’t like and give her a house.

Commentary:
🏠💍 "Who needs a spouse when you can just gift a house? 🤷‍♂️ Maybe this is the ultimate 'no strings attached' relationship strategy! 😆 Just make sure she doesn't cozy up to the house more than to you! 🤣"
Jan 21, 2025
Share →: I wish I loved anything as much as my two year old loves pulling my pants down.

Commentary:
"Ah, the pure joy of toddler fashion exploration! 👖😄 Who needs wardrobe malfunctions when you have an enthusiastic fashion critic at home? 😂 #ParentingAdventures"
Jan 21, 2025
Share →: I thought my friends in their 60s were making love in the other room but they were just putting on their socks.

Commentary:
"Ah, the age-old confusion between love-making and sock-putting-on activities! 😂 Who says romance is dead when you can have a thrilling sock-fitting session instead? 🧦💕"
Jan 21, 2025
Share →: If you don’t want to be in love with me that’s fine. You’re entitled to your wrong and very stupid opinions.

Commentary:
"Ah, the bold confidence in the face of rejection! 💁‍♂️ Who needs love when you have an unwavering belief in your own awesomeness? 🤣 Clearly, some hearts just can't handle all this fabulousness! 💔 #ConfidenceGoals"
Jan 20, 2025
Share →: If I got a Dollar for every time I thought about you, I would start thinking about you.

Commentary:
"If I had a dollar for every time I thought about you, I'd probably be contemplating retirement plans by now. 💸 But hey, that just means you're worth every penny of my mental wealth! 💭😄"
Jan 20, 2025
Share →: I want someone who will look at me the same way I look at chocolate cake.

Commentary:
"Oh, sweet love! 🍫💕 May your relationship be as deeply indulgent and full of satisfaction as a slice of chocolate cake. Just remember, a little extra sweetness never hurt anyone! 😉🍰 #RelationshipGoals"
Jan 20, 2025
Share →: People always talk about how they love to sit in their cars for a while once they get home. Whenever I do that, my Uber driver yells at me.

Commentary:
"Seems like your Uber driver has a strict 'drop and go' policy! 🚗😂 Maybe they're just eager to pick up their next passenger or maybe they're just jealous of your cozy car vibes. Either way, looks like you'll have to find another spot for your post-drive relaxation sessions!"
Jan 20, 2025
Share →: In a room full of art, I’d still stare at you.

Commentary:
"Looks like someone's mastered the art of attention-stealing! 🎨😏 Who needs a gallery when you've got captivating company right in front of you? 😂 #AllEyesOnYou"
Jan 20, 2025
Share →: There is sex without love, there is love without sex, and there is me without both.

Commentary:
"Ah, the eternal triangle of relationships: sex, love, and… wait, where's my pizza? 🍕🤷‍♂️ #SingleAndReadyForCarbs"