I think if you ask Kanye for a million at the right time, he'll give it to you.

I think if you ask Kanye for a million at the right time, he’ll give it to you.

Commentary:
Well, timing is everything with Kanye – it's like catching a shooting star 🌠 in a bottle of Yeezy magic ✨. Just make sure you're in sync with his vibe du jour, and you might just hit the jackpot 💰. Just don't ask during a Taylor Swift rant 😉.

My biggest sexual fantasy is someone throwing a million dollars on my naked body and then leaving me alone.

My biggest sexual fantasy is someone throwing a million dollars on my naked body and then leaving me alone.

Commentary:
"If only our wishes had monetary value! 😂 Imagine the joy of being rich and literally **showered** in cash, but hey, maybe being left alone afterward is the real treasure 🤑💸 #FantasyGoals"

I haven't exaggerated in like a million years.

I haven’t exaggerated in like a million years.

Commentary:
"Wow, someone call the Exaggeration Police 🚔 because we've got a rare species here! It's been a million years since they last stretched the truth! 🤥😂"

Many years ago, I stood up to 100-200 million others only to sit in meetings now.

Many years ago, I stood up to 100-200 million others only to sit in meetings now.

Commentary:
"From standing out in a crowd to blending in at dull meetings – who knew adulting came with such plot twists? 🤷‍♂️ At least you can brag about your versatility, right?"

I don't know if I'm pregnant or what, but I've been craving 3 million dollars so bad.

I don’t know if I’m pregnant or what, but I’ve been craving 3 million dollars so bad.

Commentary:
"Either that's a very extravagant pregnancy craving or someone needs to check if there's a money tree growing somewhere nearby! 💰🌳 Maybe it's just the financial fertility kicking in! 🤰😂"

The two most popular things to do on the internet are arguing about politics and looking at naked people. Million dollar website idea: combine both — naked people arguing about politics.

The two most popular things to do on the internet are arguing about politics and looking at naked people. Million dollar website idea: combine both — naked people arguing about politics.

Commentary:
"Introducing the ultimate online showdown: Naked Debates! 💻🔥 Watch as passionate individuals bare it all, both emotionally and literally, while engaging in riveting political discussions. Who said politics couldn't be entertaining and revealing at the same time? 💬🔞 #NakedPolitics"

If the zombie apocalypse happens we’re double screwed because there are millions on record as having no brain.

If the zombie apocalypse happens we’re double screwed because there are millions on record as having no brain.

Commentary:
Looks like in a zombie apocalypse, we won't just have the undead to worry about, but also a whole bunch of brainless folks running around! 🧟‍♂️🧠 Better start stocking up on survival supplies and maybe some extra IQ points just in case!

“Girls just want to have fun!” No, I want one million dollars cash.

“Girls just want to have fun!” No, I want one million dollars cash.

Commentary:
"Who needs fun when you can have a million dollars in cold, hard cash 💸💰 Girls will be girls…with expensive tastes! 😄💁‍♀️ #CashOverFun"

I don't need to touch grass, I need to touch one million dollars cash.

I don’t need to touch grass, I need to touch one million dollars cash.

Commentary:
"Who needs grass when you can roll in a bed of crisp Benjamins? 💵💰 Talk about living the high life! Just remember, money can't photosynthesize like grass does… but hey, it does pay for a fancy lawn service! 😉 #CashOverGrass"

If an alien is 60 million light years away and is watching us through a telescope, it will see dinosaurs.

If an alien is 60 million light years away and is watching us through a telescope, it will see dinosaurs.

Commentary:
Ah, our cosmic neighbors are getting a prehistoric show from afar 🦕👽 Who needs Jurassic Park when you have live dino action in outer space? 🌌 #TimeTravelDinoSpectacle