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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇯🇴 has bookmarked:

Not gonna lie, the age I’m turning this year sounds a little serious, and I don’t like it.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has shared:

There are no laws against pineapples on pizza.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has copied:

What doesn’t kill you will text you in 5 months to ask “What are you doing?”

Someone from 🇲🇿 has viewed:

I was actually about to do a workout when the couch threw itself protectively under me.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has viewed:

Camping? No, thank you. If I wanted to sleep outside, I wouldn’t pay my mortgage.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has copied:

Sometimes I do something completely out of character, like say no to a slice of pizza, or trust someone.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has viewed:

You can tell it’s desperate times the way spam messages have gone from fantasies like ‘I am a prince and I want to give you money’ to ‘I am an HR manager and I have a real job for you!’

Someone from 🇰🇮 has downloaded:

Talking to some people is like folding a fitted sheet.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has copied:

I’m just so lazy because I’m still recovering from the fact that I used to be the fastest sperm.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has bookmarked:

I assume my soulmate has sold his soul to the devil.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

643 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,236

Funny Quotes Topics

17,359

Funny Quotes Images

15,236

Updated

Dec 30, 2025

Users Online

4,077

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Slack:

If we were both crows, I’d bring you shiny things.

Going bananas on WeChat:

I was at the cemetery when a little kid walked up to me and said she was afraid. I took her hand and told her that I used to be afraid too… when I was alive.

Seen just now on Instagram:

Ever feel like you’re adulting, but only on the outside? Inside, you’re just a kid hoping someone else will make dinner.

Spreading quickly via Instagram:

Girls are perverts when they like you.

Making waves on WeChat:

I’m tired and drank a lot of coffee, so now I’m tired but faster.

Making waves on Telegram:

Spice up your anxiety attack by playing the Jaws theme song.

Going viral on Instagram:

I have the bruises of a much more active person.

Spreading quickly via Messenger:

Just let your girlfriend be crazy, like who cares, bro.

Live now on WeChat:

I don’t really care how you met your partner. Tell me about how you met your nemesis.

Just shared via TikTok:

There’s nothing scarier than sneezing with a full cup of coffee in your hand.

17 Funny opinions quotes

Funny opinions quotes bring a splash of humor 😄 and a twist of wit 🌀 to everyday thoughts! Whether you love clever comebacks or silly takes on life’s quirks, these gems will tickle your funny bone 😂 and spark a smile 😎. Perfect for sharing with friends or brightening up your feed, get ready to see opinions like you’ve never heard them before! 🎉✨

New funny opinions quotes 👇

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All funny opinions quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

23 shares on Facebook this month:

My boyfriend is mad at me because I keep replying with a fire extinguisher emoji to every girl that comments with a flame emoji on his pictures.

55 shares on Pinterest this month:

The toughest part of being a vegan is keeping it to yourself.

79 shares on LinkedIn this month:

My dental plan is, “I guess I’ll just chew on this side of my mouth from now on.”

16 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Vatican City should be called Popenhagen.

66 shares on X this month:

Revenge? No. I just post hot selfies and let the algorithm do God’s work.

37 shares on YouTube this month:

All we needed to be happy in the 90s was music and cigarettes.

54 shares on WeChat this month:

I think my boss is delusional; he keeps shaking his head and calls me Jesus Christ.

84 shares on Threads this month:

My son put his dish in the sink so I rushed him to urgent care.

12 shares on TikTok this month:

It’s healthy to be a little insane sometimes.

17 shares on Slack this month:

I can’t wait to go to bed, get terrible sleep, and wake up exhausted with a sore back.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Outfit repeater. Meal repeater. Movie rewatcher. I know what I like.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

When a man is a good cook, that cancels out like three red flags.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

I would really like to meet this “other candidate” who keeps taking all the jobs I’ve been applying to.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Playing dumb for five minutes often saves a lot of work.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Whenever I’m willing to sell my soul, there’s usually food involved.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

If you need me, I will be at the library sniffing old books.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Note to self: No more bitching about ugly furniture with people at IKEA whose home you haven’t been to yet.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

If I’m ever in a coma, please put chapstick on my lips.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Goodnight to the men who know one woman is enough. The rest can die.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Sorry, Mom, I can’t go outside, I’m ugly.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

643 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,236

Funny Quotes Topics

17,359

Funny Quotes Images

15,236

Updated

Dec 30, 2025

Users Online

3,899

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇬 has copied:

Climbing Mount Everest looks super boring and dumb. You just walk uphill, are cold and at the brink of death. No thanks.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has shared:

I didn’t ghost you, I saved you from me.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has viewed:

The only ‘survival horror’ game I play is called ‘getting up every day and leaving the house.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has shared:

My dentist said my teeth were stained and asked if I smoke or drink coffee? I said, “I drink it.”

Someone from 🇨🇭 has downloaded:

I’m so single. When they ask me for an emergency contact, I put the neighbor’s dog.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has bookmarked:

Girls are perverts when they like you.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has bookmarked:

“You’re at the age where both 1990 and 2003 are flirting with you.”

Someone from 🇲🇼 has downloaded:

Why is experimental noise music always scary metallic noises and never fun sounds like people clapping and laughing and like bubbles and stuff?

Someone from 🇵🇱 has bookmarked:

I hate it when some random company refers to me as their “customer.” I’m like, look, we had one night of drunken shopping, we are not in a relationship.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has viewed:

If my family starts talking politics at Thanksgiving, I’m changing the subject by announcing I’m pregnant.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Reddit:

We were never supposed to have this much access to stupid people’s thoughts, beliefs, and opinions.

Broadcasted on Instagram:

Welcome to Netflix. We have every movie but the one you actually want to watch.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

Traffic is the fault of the guy immediately in front of you.

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

Everything I like is either expensive, illegal, or wont text me back.

Trending via Slack:

A selfie only a mother could like.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

All day I think about sleep but when it’s time to go to bed I don’t wanna.

Making waves on Reddit:

Running to the boarding gate is my favorite workout.

Breaking via WhatsApp:

I don’t think human beings were built to know everything going on in the world all the time.

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

Dress for the demons you want, not the demons you have.

Just landed via X:

I’ll be home for Christmas, because that’s where I live.

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