Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇮 has viewed:

My dog understands several human words. I don’t understand any dog barks. He may be smarter than me.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has downloaded:

Nobody gives me butterflies anymore. Y’all just give me brain damage.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has shared:

An email so annoying, you wanna return the computer to the store.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has shared:

Super excited about a brand new week of hanging on by a thread.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has viewed:

I’m not afraid of ghosts because everyone who’s mad at me is still alive.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has downloaded:

I’ve cooked for men I should have poisoned, so yeah, I do have self-control.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has copied:

Please don’t buy my book on reverse psychology.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has shared:

Caveman bartender: “This one’s on the cave.”

Someone from 🇱🇸 has shared:

I hope whoever came up with the spelling for Wednesday was punished for their actions.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has copied:

My favorite dance move is trying to get out of my own way.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,420

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Threads:

I’m a go with the flow kind of gal unless the flow is after 9pm or involves parallel parking.

Broadcasted on WeChat:

Not wearing glasses anymore, I’ve seen enough.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Captain America taught me that I just need to take performance enhancing drugs to be loved by everyone.

Broadcasted on Telegram:

Look away from your laptop for 1 second, and MS Teams will say you left the country.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

I talk a lot of shit for someone who is startled by my own toast popping up while I’m watching it. Every. Single. Time.

Trending via Slack:

Imagine being a dinosaur. No work or bills. No drama. Just extinct.

Making waves on Snapchat:

If I could have dinner with anyone, living or dead, I’d pick living.

Going bananas on Slack:

Pretending you don’t notice people staring at you is a skill.

Breaking via Facebook:

4 out 3 people struggle with math.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

Therapy isn’t enough, she needs to know people congratulated me when we broke up.

Funny poorly built quotes

New funny poorly built quotes 👇

Exorcist came by. Says house isn’t possessed, just incredibly poorly built.

1 week ago

building, built, came, construction, exorcist, house, humor, just, poorly, poorly built, possession

All funny poorly built quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections

✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

37 shares on Threads this month:

If you tell lies about me, I’ll tell the truth about you.

21 shares on Reddit this month:

Of all her outfits, my shirt and no underwear will always be my favorite.

80 shares on Slack this month:

Everyone’s a gangster until the grocery store switches their aisles around.

20 shares on Twitch this month:

Crashed my car reading a billboard that said, “Don’t text and drive.”

86 shares on Twitch this month:

It’s so hot that my shadow just went back inside and gave me the finger.

48 shares on Pinterest this month:

How inappropriate is it to ask a stranger to scratch your back? Need to know ten minutes ago.

61 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Chocolate doesn’t ask silly questions, chocolate understands.

49 shares on Discord this month:

I overthink, therefore I am.

85 shares on Facebook this month:

I used to think “9 to 5” means a job from 9 a.m. to 5 p.m.

34 shares on WhatsApp this month:

You were there at the beginning of the Internet if you’ve heard the following: “Get off the web, I need to make a call!”

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇼🇸 has downloaded:

You can have glossy lips or you can have a cat. You can’t have both.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has viewed:

Cigarettes are a better networking tool than LinkedIn could ever dream of being.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has downloaded:

This year has been the perfect blend of me losing my mind and having the time of my life.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has viewed:

Life is like a game of chess. I don’t enjoy it very much.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has downloaded:

If you get drunk and message your ex, don’t worry. When you wake up, send bitcoin ads and pretend you were hacked.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has copied:

I never oversleep in the mornings. I set an alarm and a back-up alarm. Plus, there’s also a noisy kid once those fail.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has viewed:

I haven’t broken a mirror lately, but my water broke and I’ve had seven years of kids crawling into my bed.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has bookmarked:

I wish people knew how good I can sing when I’m alone in my car and in my shower.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has downloaded:

Feelings are like children. You don’t want them driving the car, but you shouldn’t stuff them in the trunk either.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has shared:

I hate that I present as an independent woman who doesn’t need any help. It’s a facade. Help me.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

Just once I wanna slide down a dinosaur at the end of my workday, is that too much to ask for?

Making waves on Messenger:

One thing I hate more than a liar is a liar that thinks I’m dumb.

Going viral on Twitch:

Yeah, no worries, man. You just showed everyone that you have a lot of resentments bubbling underneath, but otherwise, it was a cool evening.

Seen just now on WeChat:

I’m gonna be the first zoomer to start dropping the ‘two thousand’ when referring to the past. “Yeah, that was back in ‘17.”

Freshly posted on Messenger:

It’s so unfair that saying “xd” is still socially acceptable, but only if you’re speaking Spanish.

Freshly posted on Threads:

You’re so cultured I’mma start calling you Yogurt.

Spotted on Pinterest:

All I’m saying is that porn gives us an unrealistic expectation of how quickly the electrician shows up.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Slipping into something a little more comfortable (psychosis).

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Sex is cool, but have you ever received reassurance without asking for it?

Trending via Instagram:

Roses are red, violets are blue, sunflowers are yellow. I bet you were expecting something romantic, but no, this is just gardening facts.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Funny poorly built quotes

New funny poorly built quotes 👇

Exorcist came by. Says house isn’t possessed, just incredibly poorly built.

All funny poorly built quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨