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New funny quotes: 56 this month

15,809 funny quotes and pics

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Updated: Mar 13, 2026

 

 

 

 

195 Funny relationships quotes

Funny relationship quotes are all about the ups and downs that come with being in a couple! 😆💑 Whether it’s dealing with misunderstandings, playful banter, or realizing how much you’ve changed for each other, these quotes remind us that relationships are full of funny moments. After all, love might be serious, but laughter is what keeps it fun! 😂❤️🗣️

Relationships are actually easy when you’re not dating a retard.

Posted onFeb 3, 2026

The problem with relationships these days is you don’t know if you’re the one being cheated on, or cheated with.

Posted onFeb 3, 2026

That masculine urge to completely avoid relationships until you get your life together.

Posted onFeb 3, 2026

Relationships are only serious when photos are posted by a man.

Posted onFeb 2, 2026

Life is basically avoiding people who have seen you naked, whilst trying to find new people to see you naked.

Posted onFeb 2, 2026

I’ve tasted long-term relationships, I’ve tasted casual dating. I highly recommend focusing on your career and going to sleep before 9 p.m. ..!

Posted onFeb 2, 2026

Your first non-broke girlfriend will change your whole perspective about relationships.

Posted onFeb 2, 2026

I miss having that butterfly feeling. People give me roach vibes at this point.

Posted onFeb 1, 2026

Men be like “I would do anything for you,” and then do nothing.

Posted onFeb 1, 2026

Just because I loved you at one point doesn’t mean I will always love you. I’m not Whitney Houston.

Posted onFeb 1, 2026

The sluttiest thing a man can do is have an ethical dilemma over his lust for you.

Posted onFeb 1, 2026

If only men knew the power “I made reservations, I’ll pick you up at 7” held instead of “I don’t know, whatever you wanna do.”

Posted onFeb 1, 2026

Love is not pushing them down the stairs when you have the opportunity.

Posted onFeb 1, 2026

Siblings are proof you can love someone and also dislike them at the same time.

Posted onFeb 1, 2026

I always bring luggage when visiting my mom because I know she’ll send me on a guilt trip.

Posted onFeb 1, 2026

I’ve been blocked, unfollowed, and unfriended, but I’ve never been told I’m bad in bed.

Posted onFeb 1, 2026

The best part about being single is sleeping around. You can sleep all over that bed of yours – left, right, middle.

Posted onFeb 1, 2026

The ideal girlfriend breaks your heart, so you go on to do great things.

Posted onFeb 1, 2026

Every day, I’m gaslit into oblivion by beautiful women, and then I go to sleep.

Posted onFeb 1, 2026

Sending messages is easy. Living with them forever is the hard part.

Posted onFeb 1, 2026

God created childbirth so women could know how men feel when we have a cold.

Posted onFeb 1, 2026

I made a graph showing my past relationships. It has an ex axis and a why axis.

Posted onFeb 1, 2026

I was guest-starring on The Love Boat when you woke me up. You’re dead to me.

Posted onFeb 1, 2026

My love language is caffeine and being left alone until I’m kind again.

Posted onFeb 1, 2026

“Dating pool” is incredibly optimistic. More like dating drainage.

Posted onFeb 1, 2026

I hate starting new relationships. I gotta act like I ain’t crazy for two months.

Posted onFeb 1, 2026

I hope you all get laid soon, for your own mental health.

Posted onFeb 1, 2026

The only thing you can count on with some people is that you can’t count on them.

Posted onJan 31, 2026

Starting to think I’m single because of everyone else’s shortcomings.

Posted onJan 31, 2026

Men be like, “I want you.” Yeah, to suffer.

Posted onJan 31, 2026

I’m running out of people I like.

Posted onJan 31, 2026

Sometimes I just want a man to talk to me in the same voice he uses to talk to his dog.

Posted onJan 31, 2026

Mambo No. 5, but it’s in a minor key, and I’m naming women who didn’t text me back.

Posted onJan 31, 2026

Why don’t straight men and lesbians hang out like straight women and gays do?

Posted onJan 31, 2026

No more relationships for me, the last one was an embarrassment to my gangsta.

Posted onJan 31, 2026

Marry the man who treats your dumb questions like they’re NASA-level problems.

Posted onJan 31, 2026

If we start dating now, we could be arguing on a road trip by August.

Posted onJan 31, 2026

Stop blaming everyone for your problems. Pick one person you really hate and blame them for everything.

Posted onJan 31, 2026

What doesn’t kill you makes you weird at intimacy.

Posted onJan 31, 2026

They should invent a man who is being genuine when he says things to me.

Posted onJan 31, 2026

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