Funny quotes say

174 Funny say quotes

When they say screen time is bad for you, they just mean the ones at work, right?

4 days ago

Being in college when The Chainsmokers dropped Closer was an experience to say the least.

1 week ago

It is a mistake to say that the people who live a hundred years from now will have nothing to laugh at. They can laugh at us.

2 weeks ago

Whoever is dating my ex, all I can say is: cheat first!

2 weeks ago

Women love it when you approach them on the street and say “whoa, is there a hot babe convention in town?”

2 weeks ago

Only money has the right to say “you’ll regret losing me”. The rest of you calm down.

3 weeks ago

I used to be cool and now I say things like “It’s so loud in here, I can’t hear myself think”.

1 month ago

If you say “awesome sauce” on a first date, you’ll still have that lucky condom in your wallet tomorrow.

1 month ago

It’s time I admit something: Sometimes, when I say good night, I don’t actually go to bed right away.

1 month ago

Not a religious man but I do say a short prayer whenever I open a gas station restroom door.

2 months ago

Old people be like “no elbows on the table, it’s rude” then say something racist.

2 months ago

I don’t flirt, I just say weird things and hope something sticks.

2 months ago

I wish it were social acceptable to say “I don’t care” and walk away mid conversation when you’re bored.

2 months ago

Who else here can say that they have NEVER watched any of the Kardashian shows?

2 months ago

They say dress for the job you want, but this baby diaper isn’t very comfortable.

2 months ago

People always ask me “Do you believe in God?” and I say of course it’s important to have self-belief.

2 months ago

Sometimes you just gotta say LOL and move on.

2 months ago

One day you’re hip and cool, and then out of nowhere you say things like hip and cool.

3 months ago

I love dogs with human names because you get to say things like Bob pooped on the rug again.

3 months ago

Jackie Chan used to say “I don’t want trouble“ and then break everybody’s legs.

3 months ago