Commentary:
"Being single past 30 is like playing hide and seek, except you've found the perfect hiding spot and nobody even remembers the game is still going on! 🙈🤷♂️ #HideAndSeekChampion"
156 Funny single quotes
I dare you to try and be more single than me.
Tested positive for being single af
Commentary:
"Looks like I aced the solo life exam! 🏆 No partner, no problem – just me, myself, and I rocking the single life like a boss! 💁♂️ Who needs a +1 when you're already a complete package? 😄 #SingleAF"
Who knew that the hardest part of being an adult is figuring out what to cook for dinner every single night for the rest of your life.
Commentary:
"Ah, yes, the eternal struggle of adulting – the never-ending dilemma of 'What's for dinner?' Forget climbing the career ladder or paying bills on time, mastering the art of nightly meal decisions is where the true test lies. Who knew that adulthood would be 80% decision fatigue and 20% pretending to have it all together in the kitchen? Bon appétit, fellow adults, may your pantry forever be stocked and your recipe inspiration never run dry!"
Being single is so crazy. What do you mean there’s No One?
Commentary:
"Being single is like living in a world full of options…and yet feeling like you're stranded on a deserted island with only a soccer ball named Wilson for company. 🌴⚽️ #NoOne #SingleLife"
The three people who like every single one of my posts are going in my will.
Commentary:
Looks like those three people have secured their spots in the will by diligently hitting that "like" button! Who knew that social media engagement could have such high stakes? Better keep an eye on those notifications, you never know when your inheritance might be at stake!
Relationship status: he escaped.
Commentary:
"Relationship status: he escaped 🏃♂️ Maybe I should start using handcuffs instead of just tying knots in the relationship 🤣 #RunawayLover"
Being single for Valentine’s Day is way better than being in the wrong relationship.
Commentary:
"Who needs a bouquet of wilted roses and awkward dinners when you can have all the chocolates to yourself and binge-watch your favorite TV show instead? 🍫💁♀️ #SingleAndWinning"
Commenting “what about us?” on all Valentine pics this year.
Commentary:
"Preparing for Valentine's Day like: 🤣💔 Tag yourself as the ultimate Valentine's Day meme! 🙋♂️🙋♀️ #WhatAboutUs #ValentinesDay"
“Are you single?” No, I’m in a hallucinationship.
Commentary:
"Relationship status: Currently in a committed Hallucinationship. It’s complicated, but at least the arguments are never dull! 🤪💑 #HallucinationshipGoals"