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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇪🇪 has copied:

Nothing is worse than seeing a gorgeous girl that I’d never approach or stand a chance with and then finding out she has a boyfriend.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has shared:

I like to live life dangerously by occasionally sticking my foot out over the edge of the bed at night.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has shared:

You give a man your heart and he’s gonna put it under another girl’s picture.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has shared:

The only way to my heart is with a knife.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has copied:

A diamond is forever, and so is my teen’s grudge against me for some random stuff every other day.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has bookmarked:

I can now tell the hour of the day by which part of my body needs a heating pad.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has bookmarked:

The only downside to dating hot men is that when it ends, he’s still hot.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has bookmarked:

There should be bloopers at the end of horror movies, so it relaxes you before bedtime.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has copied:

It’s Monday, but at what cost?

Someone from 🇸🇰 has viewed:

“That’s an interesting take,” I say, not listening.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

788 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,950

Funny Quotes Topics

13,923

Funny Quotes Images

10,950

36 minutes ago

3,438

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Discord:

The great thing about playing the trombone is no one knows if you’re good at it or not.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

I want a restraining order on everyone who doesn’t wear deodorant.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

You know you’re old when you you barely do anything all day, but still need a nap to continue doing barely anything.

Making waves on WeChat:

I’m not drunk enough for this Teams meeting.

Shared recently on Messenger:

Twitter is basically a psychiatric ward where all the patients diagnose each other.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

I’m sick of blessings in disguise. I am ready for a blessing with absolutely no disguise whatsoever.

Going viral on Snapchat:

When you want to feel at your thinnest, walk through Walmart at any time of day.

Going viral on Instagram:

You ever have your knees crack so good that you expect them to glow in the dark. Yeah, me too.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

I’m not addicted to coffee. We’re just very close.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

When you meet twins, demand to speak with the one in charge.

Home » Funny Takeover Quotes

Funny takeover quotes

New funny takeover quotes 👇

4 months ago
Share →: When is a robot gonna take over my job? Please?

Commentary:
Oh, you can't wait to be replaced by a robot, huh? 🤖 Don't worry, your job is safe… for now! 😉 Maybe you'll have a robot co-worker before you know it! Who knows, with a little luck, you might even get to be their boss! 🤖👩‍💼
6 months ago
Share →: Aliens: We are here to take over. Me: Thank God.

Commentary:
Aliens: We are here to take over. Me: Thank God 🙏! I've been looking for an excuse to finally use my "alien invasion survival kit" 👽. Time to put those binge-watched sci-fi skills to good use! ✨🚀👾 #ReadyForTheExtraterrestrialLife.
6 months ago
Share →: So I think the mammals have now ravaged this planet long enough. It’s time for the reptiles to take over again.

Commentary:
"Looks like it's the reptile's turn to slither into the spotlight! 🐍🦎 Time for a cold-blooded takeover! Sorry mammals, the scales have tipped in favor of the reptiles! 🦖 #RiseOfTheReptiles"

For even more funny takeover quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny takeover quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

788 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,950

Funny Quotes Topics

13,923

Funny Quotes Images

10,950

36 minutes ago

3,418

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇹 has downloaded:

I’m not lazy, I’m on power saving mode.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has viewed:

If I had known how much care balcony plants need, I could have stopped taking the pill.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has viewed:

Not sure why I drink anymore. I get the same effect from standing up too fast.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has shared:

Going through life with a signature I invented as a teenager.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has viewed:

I can cope well with most situations. Hearing someone smack is not one of them.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has viewed:

Everyone tells me “take care”, but no one tells me why.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has bookmarked:

How old is older? Because I’m still waiting for this wise thing to kick in.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has bookmarked:

I am losing touch with reality and I couldn’t be happier.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has bookmarked:

Age ceases to be just a number everytime the airline announces seating queue priority.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has viewed:

The highlight of my weekends is slipping into something more comfortable and putting my feet up.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Threads:

My sweatpants sat me down and said they want me to get an office job again.

Trending via Reddit:

“Tom Cruise does his own stunts!” Okay cool, but so do I.

Seen just now on Slack:

The only running I do is to chase the ice cream truck.

Trending via Reddit:

I’ve deleted enough tweets to know that I should never get a tattoo.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

Starting your most incoherent sentence with “put simply” to deflect blame onto the reader.

Making waves on Discord:

Sometimes I say “huh,” then answer the question before you can repeat your question.

Trending via WeChat:

Adulthood means trying to convince yourself that the font is just too small and that it isn’t your eyesight going bad.

Going viral on Slack:

I was really happy about it being Friday until I realized it was only Wednesday.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

Adulting is realizing Monday is a better “off day” than Friday.

Broadcasted on WeChat:

Turns out I’m not an afternoon person either.

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