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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇾 has bookmarked:

Making fun of bands that only play 3 chords when I don’t even know what a chord is.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has downloaded:

If you think one of my posts is about you, it isn’t. Except this one.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has shared:

Changed my bio on bumble to “I’m gonna murder ur whole family” and guys still responded.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has downloaded:

For Thanksgiving don’t ask me about my life, just pass me the bottle.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has bookmarked:

Don’t buy roses for her, buy chicken nuggets. Show her you really care.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has copied:

If you think someone has put a spell on you, send me $500 and I’ll get rid of it.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has bookmarked:

I need a stunt double for when I’m navigating my way to the bathroom at night.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has bookmarked:

Memories are a bit fuzzy – but regrets? They’re in 8K and Dolby Vision.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has shared:

As you get older, nothing loses its sting more than an authority figure saying they are disappointed in you. Like, I don’t know what to tell you, dude, we can’t both live in the prison of your expectations.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has copied:

Rock bottom should give me free sandwich and coffee for how often I hit it.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

809 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,971

Funny Quotes Topics

13,936

Funny Quotes Images

10,971

40 minutes ago

3,449

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Messenger:

I had a hard time coping with the divorce. I’m fine now, but at first I was almost crazy with joy.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

I need a button in Zoom meetings where it just freezes my screen and makes it look like I’m having network issues.

Shared recently on WeChat:

If craziness could fly, some people would have their own airport.

Making waves on Snapchat:

That “meeting canceled” ping is a gift from the Gods.

Going viral on Discord:

I get you, bowel syndrome. I’m irritable, too.

Seen just now on Threads:

Stop telling people to grow up. Have you seen adults?

Freshly posted on TikTok:

If I ever become a ghost, I’m gonna go back and haunt college me. Tell him to hydrate.

Going viral on Messenger:

I have my own hand stamper at home so my coworkers will think I went someplace fun the night before.

Live now on WhatsApp:

Why waste words or gestures when a raised eyebrow is enough to make a statement?

Seen just now on TikTok:

Gordon Ramsay is only funny because he’s not talking to me like that.

Home » Funny Work Life Quotes » Page 3

24 Funny work life quotes

More funny work life quotes 👇

6 months ago
Share →: Why would I work from home when I don’t even work from work?

Commentary:
"Why work from home when work itself is a concept as elusive as a unicorn in the office? 🦄💼 Maybe home is where the snacks are just a few steps away and the dress code is strictly pajamas! 😂 #WorkFromWherever"
6 months ago
Share →: Job interview: Where do you see yourself in five years? Me: Hopefully on a sabbatical.

Commentary:
"Interviewer: Where do you see yourself in five years? Me: Hopefully on a sabbatical, sipping a margarita on a beach somewhere 🍹☀️🌴 #LifeGoals"
6 months ago
Share →: The biggest problem with working from home? I want to go home even though I’m already at home.

Commentary:
"Ah, the magical allure of wanting to go home when you're already there – a true case of 'grass is always greener' syndrome! 🏡😂 Who knew that staying at home could be the ultimate epic mind game? 😅 #WorkFromHomeStruggles"
6 months ago
Share →: Every morning when that damn alarm clock goes off, I just feel it so much: A million-dollar inheritance suits me much better than an office job.

Commentary:
"Ah, the melodious sound of the alarm clock – the daily symphony of regret and wishful thinking! 🕰️💸 Trading cubicles for castles sounds like a dream worth hitting the snooze button for! 😂 #InheritanceGoals"

For even more funny work life quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

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Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

809 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,971

Funny Quotes Topics

13,936

Funny Quotes Images

10,971

40 minutes ago

3,441

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇷🇸 has downloaded:

One of my favorite parts of grocery shopping is when somebody else does it for me.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has downloaded:

The only reason I’d want to go to heaven is to complain to the manager.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has shared:

People with ADHD be like “I can’t fry an egg, I got too much going on”.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has downloaded:

I think, therefore I am. I am, therefore I think. Therefore I am. I think.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has viewed:

I’m at the age where, if you ask me to go out after 9 p.m., I’m definitely not coming.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has downloaded:

Spotify Wrapped, but for all your bad decisions this year.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has viewed:

My friend’s kid asked me if I had any games on phone so I let her text my ex.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has viewed:

If you listen to my husband snore, you don’t need Jurassic Park anymore.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has downloaded:

You know IT have given up when the error message reads, ‘Something went wrong’.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has copied:

A moment of silence for everything I have to do but am not doing.

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on Telegram:

It’s so hot outside that when I opened my front door I thought I was checking on my oven.

Seen just now on Discord:

Not to brag, but I just walked upstairs and remembered why.

Seen just now on Slack:

Every morning I announce that Im going for a jog, but then I don’t go. It’s a running gag.

Seen just now on Facebook:

On average, my daily actions demonstrate I’m probably good at something else.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

I’m now at the age where happy hour is a nap.

Breaking via WeChat:

At the gym and I forgot my headphones and now I have to listen to my own thoughts. Send help.

Spotted on Slack:

I don’t know how to explain it, but sometimes cheese just falls into my cart at the grocery store.

Trending via Messenger:

I didn’t mean to gain weight. It happened by snaccident.

Shared recently on WeChat:

If I was polyamorous, I think Id date my girlfriend three times.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

Dear Snapchat memory, that’s not my friend anymore.

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