Trendy Funny Quotes

  • My youngest started kindergarten today and I cried, but mostly for his teachers.
  • Calling someone a “tough cookie” is not a compliment, tough cookies are literally the worst cookies.
  • My husband and I fell in love at first sight. Maybe I should have taken a second look.
  • Cleaned the bathroom window. Wasn’t frosted glass at all.
  • Why can’t I cry money instead of tears?
  • No matter how old you are, an empty Christmas wrapping tube is still a fun thing to bonk someone over the head with.