Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • A foghorn but for people who can’t see through their own bullshit.
  • I find it hard to believe I used to just answer my phone when it rang. No caller ID. No idea who was calling. Just picked it up and said “hello” like a goddam daredevil.
  • It was the becestershire of times, it was the worcestershire of times.
  • Seize the day! Unless it sucks. Then seize the next one.
  • A thousand curses upon anyone who has ever gone, “Why are you sitting in the dark?” and then flipped the light on without asking.
  • If I text you an accordion emoji, it means you better start acting accordingly.