Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Canceling plans like it's my part-time job! 💁‍♀️ Who needs Netflix when you've got me as the ultimate no-show entertainer? 🤣 #MasterOfCancellation"

am, cancel, entertain, humor, i, invite, me, social, someone

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

There’s no need to put a little umbrella in my drink. It’s already wet.

3 months ago

beverage, drink, humor, irony, joke, little, need, put, umbrella, wet
It’s important to fuel your body with essential nutrients, which can be found in cookies, chips, and candy.

3 months ago

body, candy, chip, chips, cookie, diet, essential, food, found, fuel, humor, important, nutrient, snack
Whoever coined the term coined the term coined the term coined the term.

2 months ago

coined, humor, repetition, term, wordplay
Job market so bad, I started following my dreams.

2 months ago

aspiration, bad, career, dreams, following, humor, i, job, job market, market, unemployment
I woke up alive again.

2 months ago

again, alive, gratitude, humor, i, life, morning, waking, waking up, woke
I accidentally bought a pair of nose-cancelling headphones and now my glasses keep falling off.

2 months ago

accident, accidentally, daily, daily life, falling, glasses, headphones, humor, i, keep, life, mishap, technology

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

32 shares on TikTok this month:

University is more like teaching yourself for a class you paid for.

22 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Have you noticed? When the relationship is new, the guy is never busy.

67 shares on Reddit this month:

I will improve my life after I doom scroll a little more. Yes.

99 shares on LinkedIn this month:

People in my real life annoy me, so I come online to annoy you.

43 shares on Reddit this month:

Starting all my work emails today with, “to whom it’s about to concern”.

27 shares on TikTok this month:

I think my soulmate might be carbs.

37 shares on WeChat this month:

Being complimented by a girl in public is like getting kissed by an angel.

62 shares on Facebook this month:

Yes, I am super annoying, but don’t worry, it’s just permanent.

92 shares on Discord this month:

(british guy unhooking your bra) All right, what’s all this, then?

87 shares on Pinterest this month:

I’m not bossy, I just know exactly what you should be doing.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇻🇨 has downloaded:

Have to connect the printer to my new laptop, and my goal is to cry no more than three times.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has downloaded:

Nothing more humbling than being at a karaoke birthday party with a bunch of singers.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has downloaded:

Nobody is meaner to me than me. So take your shot.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has bookmarked:

People text “Happy New Year” and go missing for the rest of the year!

Someone from 🇬🇪 has downloaded:

Don’t you hate it when you offer help and the other person says yes?

Someone from 🇬🇷 has copied:

Had some plain yogurt with protein powder in it for breakfast, and not only is it high in protein and very filling, it’s also disgusting.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has downloaded:

“I” before “E,” except when your foreign neighbor Keith receives eight counterfeit beige sleighs from weird, feisty, caffeinated weightlifters.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has bookmarked:

I don’t have read receipts on my phone because why would I tell on myself like that?

Someone from 🇬🇾 has shared:

I feel so discombobulated when supermarkets switch up the aisles without texting me first.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has bookmarked:

Me, when someone’s obsessed with me: Yikes! Me, when someone’s not obsessed with me: WTF?

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Threads:

The date didn’t go well but she was nice enough to send a PDF of everything I did wrong afterwards.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Do you ever wake up in the morning and you’re just like… no.

Just landed via Threads:

Bro, you gotta try this high-protein Caesar salad, cold brew, air fryer, overnight oats recipe I found on Instagram.

Spotted on WeChat:

Stages of Christmas shopping: 1. There’s plenty of time. 2. Oh no!

Going viral on Pinterest:

My new pajamas have no pockets. I don’t want to hear your problems.

Spreading quickly via LinkedIn:

Only DM me if you like disappointment.

Just landed via YouTube:

Ever since I was a little girl, I knew I wanted to skirt the issue.

Spotted on Threads:

My toxic trait is consistently cutting off the resealable part of the bag of frozen vegetables.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

Felony Vandalism is a beautiful name for a girl.

Going bananas on Threads:

Hey! (with the intention of going back to sleep)

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I am not someone you have to entertain if you invite me, because I will have canceled.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

There’s no need to put a little umbrella in my drink. It’s already wet.

It’s important to fuel your body with essential nutrients, which can be found in cookies, chips, and candy.

Whoever coined the term coined the term coined the term coined the term.

Job market so bad, I started following my dreams.

I woke up alive again.

I accidentally bought a pair of nose-cancelling headphones and now my glasses keep falling off.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨