Someone from 🇸🇳 has downloaded:

Remember: when a band skips your city on tour, it is always personal and they always hate you specifically.

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One day you’re cool and then the next, you realize your favorite pair of pants are sweatpants from the grocery store.

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I was actually about to do a workout when the couch threw itself protectively under me.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has downloaded:

I am so out of shape right now, that if someone yelled “run for your life!” I’d be like “ya’ll go ahead, I’m meetin’ Jesus today!”

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The sole purpose of some household items is to make it impossible for you to open the damn drawer.

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Just overheard someone describe their hike as “it was like mountain climbing, but flat”.

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If you pick a movie that’s longer than the flight, the pilot gets a notification to fly around for a bit.

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This Monday is Mondaying like it’s never Mondayed before.

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This meeting could have been an unread email.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has downloaded:

Dear 8 hours of sleep, I miss you so much.