Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

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Someone from 🇶🇦 has downloaded:

Every man learns for himself the uselessness of owning an iPad.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has bookmarked:

The only reason to engage with a neighbor is if either of you is on fire.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has copied:

Tattoo idea for men: spider webs in the corners of the receding hairline.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has shared:

I swear the air gets heavier around 6 p.m. on Sundays. You can feel the Microsoft Teams energy approaching.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has copied:

We’ve all at least once caught our toes when putting on our knickers and jumped around the room like idiots.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has downloaded:

My dream is to buy a horse and race it. The horse will probably beat me but it’ll still be fun.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has shared:

Why is it that your clothes only get caught on the door handle when you’re in a bad mood?

Someone from 🇬🇪 has viewed:

Whenever someone says “Per ChatGPT” or “ChatGPT says,” I look at them like they just consulted a magic 8 ball because, please, stop playing with me.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has downloaded:

I’m not gonna have a bad day. The day is gonna have a bad me.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has shared:

Just being myself is how we got into this mess.

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,482

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Telegram:

Maybe the four horsemen of the apocalypse are Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and TikTok.

Spotted on Pinterest:

And is your “sparkling personality” in the room with us now?

Spotted on Messenger:

Went jogging and came back after five minutes because I forgot something. Forgot I’m out of shape.

Spreading quickly via X:

The real pandemic was when everyone was reading The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck.

Freshly posted on Threads:

So annoying when your family knocks on the toilet door and asks what you’re doing. I’m baking a cake. HBU?

Making waves on Threads:

As long as everything is exactly the way I want it, I’m totally flexible.

Broadcasted on Facebook:

So basically, companies pay YouTube to show ads, and we pay YouTube to not show ads.

Going viral on Discord:

I love it when my dog suddenly gets up and goes to another part of the house. Did you just remember you left the stove on or something?

Seen just now on Threads:

Never underestimate my ability to effortlessly make something more difficult than it needs to be.

Just shared via Discord:

Never forget that, just a couple of years ago, people were justifying paying $20,000 for a JPEG of an ape.

I would love to change the world, but they won’t give me the source code.

2 weeks ago

Funny Quotes

Playful quote about wanting to change the world but lacking the source code.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Trying to change the world without the source code is like trying to cook without a recipe – disastrous! 🌎💻 #DeveloperDilemma"

change, code, humor, i, irony, love, me, programming, source, technology, thinking, wishful, wishful thinking, world

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Social Media Stars ⭐

69 shares on Slack this month:

I don’t weigh myself because most scales don’t know how heavy all the grudges I’m holding onto are.

43 shares on TikTok this month:

Sorry I was late, I was disassociating in the shower.

81 shares on Telegram this month:

It takes so much energy to go inside a Walmart.

98 shares on Discord this month:

I try to contain my craziness, but the lid keeps popping off.

67 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Of course I wrote a grocery list. I carefully wrote it all down and then didn’t bring it with me, like my mother and her mother before her.

83 shares on WeChat this month:

I think it is mandatory, especially in the morning, to be quiet.

86 shares on Discord this month:

Pluck a single eyebrow hair in 1994, and it never grows back. Pluck a single chin hair today, and it’s back with five friends by 6 p.m.

35 shares on Threads this month:

In university, you are either struggling academically, financially, emotionally, or all three.

28 shares on Threads this month:

Is losing your mind a hobby?

70 shares on Messenger this month:

Nothing makes me more stabby than when my husband ignores me and starts talking to the dog.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇷 has bookmarked:

According to the BMI chart, I am too short.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has downloaded:

When you have the money, you can go a whole day without eating. But when you’re broke, the dizziness starts at 6 a.m.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has copied:

Sorry, I booped your nose, but I was really hoping it was a mute button.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has viewed:

Maybe if we all sit extremely still, Monday won’t be able to see us.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has copied:

Why can’t the house clean itself? It seems to get dirty by itself.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has viewed:

Who called it an undertaker and not a host mortem?

Someone from 🇹🇲 has viewed:

You know you’re getting old when the radio stations and bars play music you don’t like, but the supermarket is throwing out banger after banger.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has viewed:

Living with a dog is 90% following each other around, watching each other go potty, and wondering what the other has in their mouth.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has viewed:

I’m addicted to following the rules I made up. And also breaking the rules I made up.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has bookmarked:

I am convinced that size matters, especially when it comes to the heart.

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Telegram:

Saying “Hmmmm” when my boss walks in so he knows I’m thinking about stuff.

Just shared via WeChat:

If it weren’t for the last minute, I’d never do anything.

Breaking via Telegram:

The art of today’s art is to persuade people that it’s art.

Just landed via WeChat:

Worst feeling in the world is when you are loyal to all your girlfriends but your favorite one is cheating on you.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

Sometimes I miss the time when there was only one idiot per village.

Spotted on Reddit:

My signature move is forgetting someone’s name 2 seconds after they tell me.

Seen just now on Slack:

Why is judge the only job where you can bang a little hammer to make people shut up? I’ve needed that in literally every job I’ve had.

Just landed via Reddit:

Wanna know a real adult life hack? Don’t tell anyone when you have a day off. Absolutely no one.

Making waves on WeChat:

You know the trouble with real life? There’s no danger music.

Shared recently on Slack:

The real flex is becoming the woman he cannot run back to.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I would love to change the world, but they won’t give me the source code.

Eatіng іn bed іs much better. Everythіng’s a napkіn.

The biggest first-world problem is having your favorite makeup product be discontinued.

Oh, to live in simpler times, when there was nothing to do but sit by the seashore and contemplate the miracle of existence.

Keep your fries close and your onion rings closer.

You know you don’t have to give your bathroom a beach theme, there’s no law.

Social Media Stars ⭐

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Activity Log ✨

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I would love to change the world, but they won’t give me the source code.

Keep the laugh going 😂

Eatіng іn bed іs much better. Everythіng’s a napkіn.

The biggest first-world problem is having your favorite makeup product be discontinued.

Is there a word for FOMO but it’s already happened and you didn’t know about it when it was happening?

Oh, to live in simpler times, when there was nothing to do but sit by the seashore and contemplate the miracle of existence.

Keep your fries close and your onion rings closer.

You know you don’t have to give your bathroom a beach theme, there’s no law.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨