Trendy Funny Quotes

  • Sleeping is my drug, my bed is my dealer and my alarm is the police.
  • Why’s it always “NYC smells like pee” and never “my pee smells like the greatest city in the world”?
  • When you want to key his car, but he doesn’t have one, so you bend his bus pass.
  • I hate when I grab a live wire and everyone sees my damn skeleton.
  • What do people do with all the extra time they save by writing ‘k’ instead of ‘ok’?
  • Treat me like a joke and I’ll leave you like it’s funny.