Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇲 has bookmarked:

If you accept a knighthood, you should have to participate in at least one jousting tournament a year. The tournaments should be televised.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has viewed:

I don’t think you all understand. If Taylor Swift didn’t have a private jet, she’d be Taylor Slow.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has bookmarked:

I love when people say, “It is what it is,” like they just discovered stoicism.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has downloaded:

No haunted houses for me this year. If I wanna be frightened, I’ll just look at my 401k.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has bookmarked:

Today feels like a good day for a cheeseburger.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has viewed:

The real flex is becoming the woman he cannot run back to.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has downloaded:

My idea of fun is watching something on the TV while I look at relevant Wikipedia articles on my phone.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has shared:

Why do they make the wine glass so large if you’re not supposed to fill it to the top?

Someone from 🇷🇺 has downloaded:

Before I had kids I was only vaguely aware that Saturday had a 7am.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has bookmarked:

Here’s the problem with fruit: it’s inconsistent. Some apples are delicious, some taste bad. Sometimes blueberries are great, sometimes they are disgusting. You know what’s the same every time? Doritos.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Feb 3, 2026

3,303

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Threads:

Everyone hates math until their paycheck looks funny, then all of a sudden you know trigonometry.

Just shared via Discord:

Pretty cool that we all come together on Christmas and celebrate the birth of Santa.

Just landed via Pinterest:

Welcome to adulthood. Everyone’s tired here.

Just landed via Snapchat:

We should all go into advertising and fix what’s going on with commercials. They need our help.

Just landed via TikTok:

No, I don’t want to read the article first, I want to argue now.

Breaking via YouTube:

I didn’t like my beard at first… then it grew on me.

Just shared via Threads:

9-5 is really 10-2 if you’re working remote.

Trending via YouTube:

Once when I was exercising, I realized that I was allergic to it. I was out of breath, sweating and my heart was racing.

Shared recently on Reddit:

During childbirth, women are in so much pain that it is almost possible for them to feel what men have to endure when they have a cold.

Shared recently on Reddit:

Most earthquakes could have been an email.

In banana years, I am bread.

1 month ago

Playful quote about feeling like bread in banana years, with a humorous and whimsical vibe.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Ah, the classic existential crisis of bananas and bread 🍌🍞. One must ponder the ripe wisdom and toasty experience that comes with advancing in banana years while feeling as dependable as a loaf of bread. It's a carb-heavy journey, indeed! 🤔😄

absurdity, age, am, banana, bread, food, humor, i, year’s

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

88 shares on X this month:

Some people get a bit strange as they get older. Not me. I’ve always been like that!

73 shares on Reddit this month:

Last night’s dream could have been an email.

26 shares on X this month:

Stupid cow blocking the road. HOW DAIRY!

13 shares on WeChat this month:

People are too judgmental these days… I can tell just by looking at them.

29 shares on Discord this month:

Stop blaming everyone for all of your problems. Pick the one person you really hate and blame them for everything.

98 shares on Threads this month:

Keep your friend’s toast and your enemy’s toaster.

28 shares on Snapchat this month:

I don’t want to sound controversial, but having Monday off is great. We should do this every week.

26 shares on WeChat this month:

Please don’t dm me with the intention of dating me. You deserve less.

64 shares on Messenger this month:

If you look close enough, everyone is insane.

32 shares on Threads this month:

Someday I will make a sandwich that will change my life forever.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

18 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m either at work, going to work, coming home from work, getting ready for work, getting some sleep for work, or thinking about not wanting to go to work.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

I have a sundress and no man to bend me over in it, sad day.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

People out there having five-year plans, and here I am waking up just hoping I remember what day it is.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Started from the bottom and I’m still ain’t shit.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

When I turned into the harbor of marriage, I didn’t know that a warship was anchored there.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

If I don’t text you saying Happy New Year, we still gang, I’m just lazy.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

I was gonna brush up against you like a cat, but whatever, bro.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

I like my coffee so strong that it wakes up the neighbors.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Keep posting, I’m diagnosing you.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

I stopped experimenting in bed after the great honey disaster of 2015.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,567

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇹 has copied:

Phone is a cigarette for eyes.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has bookmarked:

Am I the only person who would rather almost fall over carrying the shopping than walk a second time?

Someone from 🇲🇩 has shared:

Perks of being a girl: You can think about whatever you want in public without worrying about boners.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has downloaded:

Your future doctor is using ChatGPT to pass med school so you better start eating healthy.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has bookmarked:

Liquor store clerk: “Do you need help?” Me: “Yes, but I decided to come here instead.”

Someone from 🇮🇶 has shared:

Passwords are like underwear: You shouldn’t leave them out where people can see them, you should change them regularly, and you shouldn’t loan them out to strangers.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has downloaded:

Neurodivergents will be like, ‘I’m so tired,’ and then refuse to sleep because they haven’t had enough me time after surviving the day.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has bookmarked:

Before I work on myself, does anyone like me unhinged?

Someone from 🇻🇺 has viewed:

I hate the person I become when I try to open a package using the ‘Tear Here’ notch, and it stays sealed.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has copied:

I need someone to convince me into or out of buying a jetski. I can’t keep living in this purgatory.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Telegram:

God knew I’d be too powerful if He made me not annoying to women.

Going viral on Pinterest:

Me: Please let me sleep! Brain: Nope, we have to stay up together and go over every bad life decision we have made so far.

Spreading quickly via LinkedIn:

Gwyneth Paltrow, I received the message you sent me last night in my dream and will proceed with the plan.

Making waves on Slack:

Coffee is just goth water.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

Welcome to your 50s, your joints are now meteorologists.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

Gatekeeping how insanely handsome I am by looking like total shit all the time.

Just shared via Threads:

Me, one week before the new year: Not to brag, but I have enough money to live comfortably for the rest of the year.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

Sometimes all you need is a Saturday to sleep, eat, and do absolutely nothing else all day.

Freshly posted on Slack:

I know how to use an abacus as a tambourine.

Making waves on Threads:

If you want to be sure that you never forget your wife’s birthday, just try forgetting it once.

© 2026. All rights reserved.

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴