Is it ‘My wife and I’ or ‘Me and my wife’? Anyway, we just robbed a liquor store.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has bookmarked:

Aging isn’t even 1% as scary as whatever is going on with the people trying not to.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has shared:

Messed up and threw a surprise party for my minimalist friend. Now 25 of us are hiding behind the granite orb.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has shared:

The 69 obsession turning into 67 is a recession indicator.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has viewed:

If a tree falls on your ex in the woods and no one’s around to hear it, you should probably still get rid of the chainsaw.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has downloaded:

Celery is 95% water and 100% not pizza.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has downloaded:

It’s actually quite simple: I don’t want to eat less, I just want to weigh less.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has copied:

His palm trees are Serengeti, destination wedding, luggage is heavy. There’s vomit on his tux already, Dollar store confetti.