Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇼 has downloaded:

Chores give kids a sense of responsibility while teaching relevant life skills such as procrastination.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has viewed:

I wonder if that football guy will be at the Taylor Swift game again today.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has bookmarked:

Women will brag about their intuition, and then date a DJ.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has viewed:

Rich people go to parties. It’s what they do, and somehow we must all watch videos of it.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has shared:

Unfollowing high school people really is a form of self-care.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has copied:

This quote is invisible. Only people who masturbate a lot can read it.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has shared:

Having a cat is like having a roommate that doesn’t want to hang out and never intends on being friends.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has downloaded:

Group projects in school weren’t meant to teach you teamwork, they were meant to teach you how to deal with the incompetence of your coworkers in the workplace.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has bookmarked:

The only thing you can count on with some people is that you can’t count on them.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has viewed:

I love talkative cats. Like, yeah, bro. Meow, meow! You’re so right.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

353 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,622

Funny Quotes Topics

17,673

Funny Quotes Images

15,622

Updated

Jan 12, 2026

Users Online

3,385

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on X:

Life is like bread. It gets hard at some point.

Shared recently on Reddit:

You know what part I love about waking up? None of it. Let me sleep!

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

I’m not your dream woman. I am the sudden shouting of ravens that you hear when you enter a part of the forest you shouldn’t have.

Trending via Reddit:

Not me out here checking the growth progress of my potted flowers only a couple hours after I planted the seeds in the first place.

Going viral on Reddit:

I hope the world needs to be saved from the apocalypse with video game skills so my teen’s entire life won’t have been a complete waste.

Broadcasted on TikTok:

Another fine day ruined by responsibilities.

Live now on X:

I just agree with people so that they stop talking.

Broadcasted on WeChat:

The word abbreviation sure is long for what it means.

Shared recently on Threads:

Carefully choosing which wine to pair with a McRib.

Just landed via Twitch:

I still make time for all my favorite hobbies, like drinking, swearing, and making people feel uncomfortable.

It’s always “you’re so cute when you’re mad,” until the house is on fire.

It’s always “you’re so cute when you’re mad,” until the house is on fire.
Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Ah yes, it's all fun and games until the adorable angry face turns into a raging inferno emoji 🔥🏠😠 #cutebutdeadly"

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

29 shares on WeChat this month:

Home Depot should allow men over 40 to have birthday parties in their stores.

23 shares on Pinterest this month:

Stop being so boyfriendable if you can’t be my boyfriend.

27 shares on YouTube this month:

Can’t. I’m busy taking this Buzzfeed quiz to find out what kind of potato I am.

75 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Good morning only to those who duel at dawn, drink at dusk, and haunt their lovers in between.

63 shares on WeChat this month:

Someone is probably in the worst argument of their life right now. LOL!

40 shares on Instagram this month:

Being on Twitter right now is like playing the violin on the Titanic, except we are also making fun of the iceberg and the iceberg is getting genuinely mad.

54 shares on Reddit this month:

In America we have marijuana. In France they have oui’d.

19 shares on Twitch this month:

First date idea: we search for each other’s criminal history together.

82 shares on Facebook this month:

Morning me just stripped the bedding. Evening me is going to be pissed.

11 shares on Threads this month:

If you get hangovers, it’s because you drank the beers with impure intentions and heavy karmic debt.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Them: OMG, I haven’t seen you in so long. Me: Yeah, that was on purpose.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Paycheck hit. I’m at Michaels Arts & Crafts supply store telling them to bring out Michael.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Who are these people that buy unsalted butter on purpose?

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Self-discipline is tough because I’m the boss of me, and that guy runs a real loose ship.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Getting up early would be easier if we could keep our eyes closed.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

I’ve realized about a third of my life is spent trying to ignore the fact that I have to pee.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

No thank you, I only like men who have no interest in me.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

People aren’t so bad if you stay indoors and don’t talk to them.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

The real anti-aging regimen is retaining your childlike wonder and whimsy.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

So many spreadsheets and not once did I feel excelled.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

353 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,622

Funny Quotes Topics

17,673

Funny Quotes Images

15,622

Updated

Jan 12, 2026

Users Online

3,431

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇭🇹 has viewed:

We have now entered the void (25th December to 31st December).

Someone from 🇦🇸 has downloaded:

Neighbors are fighting. Can I knock on the wall and ask them to speak up so I know whose side I’m on?

Someone from 🇬🇲 has downloaded:

I’m going to hell in every religion.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has viewed:

I swear the air gets heavier around 6 p.m. on Sundays. You can feel the Microsoft Teams energy approaching.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has copied:

Maybe making another financially irresponsible decision will fix me.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has bookmarked:

I would like to thank everyone who destroyed me into the person I am today.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has viewed:

In case anyone hasn’t told you today, I’m beautiful.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has bookmarked:

My grandfather tried to warn them about the Titanic. He screamed and shouted about the iceberg and how the ship was going to sink, but all they did was throw him out of the theater.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has viewed:

You don’t scare me. I used to have to call and ask a girl’s parents if she was there.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has copied:

My signature move is me looking for my phone that I’m currently holding in my hand.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Twitch:

Book reviews be like: “5 stars. I’m sobbing. I’m unwell. I haven’t eaten in 16 hours. Highly recommend.”

Just shared via Instagram:

Being a woman is hard. You always want to buy something, slap someone, lose weight and eat something sweet.

Live now on WeChat:

The only guarantee in life is, if you run errands looking like shit, you will run into everyone you haven’t seen in months.

Going viral on Messenger:

Do you want to sit on the porch with me until we die or not?

Going bananas on Reddit:

“I’ve never met a medical receptionist that I believed wanted me to live.”

Going viral on Reddit:

I feel like the person who named pink eye also named orange juice.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

The secret to a good marriage is that it’s all about give and take. Giving each other frequent back rubs and ordering lots of takeout.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

Every triangle is a love triangle when you love triangles.

Going viral on Instagram:

Men call us “gold diggers” when we expect them to pay for a meal. Honey, a gold digger goes after yachts, not a piece of chicken.

Making waves on WeChat:

The IRS needs special envelopes for when you’re not in trouble.

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