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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇭🇷 has viewed:

I can’t decide if people who wear pajamas in public have given up on life, or they are living it to the fullest.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has viewed:

50% of parenting is just trying to decide if that noise is worth walking up all of those stairs.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has downloaded:

Sometimes I need a break from myself but it’s like, ugh, everywhere I go there I am.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has shared:

The internal struggle between wanting to be productive and just wanting to nap all day.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has copied:

As a proud husband and father in my 40s, my New Year’s resolution is to sneeze even louder this year.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has viewed:

I can’t stand people who require so much validation. Please like and share this if you agree.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has shared:

Welcome to your 40s, where the hair shows up uninvited and looks pissed to be here.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has shared:

I always mean what I say, I don’t always mean to say it out loud, but I always mean it.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has shared:

Sorry for levitating at the end of your bed all night, I just think you’re really cute.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has bookmarked:

Vote for me, I’ll cut the alphabet in half.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,315

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Facebook:

Met a microbiologist once. They’re a lot bigger than I imagined.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

Shout-out to my embarrassingly squeaky ass bed frame that makes me sound more popular than I actually am to my neighbors.

Trending via Snapchat:

You should be able to call out of work if your partner is so cozy and warm in the morning.

Going viral on X:

Your nose is in the middle of your face because it is the scenter.

Live now on Twitch:

Unpopular opinion: I do enjoy third-wheeling if the couple is fun.

Spotted on Slack:

I don’t care if my parents are disappointed in me, I’m not impressed by them either.

Spotted on Discord:

“So, what are your hobbies?” Oh, I can’t afford any.

Trending via Telegram:

Study so hard until Dior is like Shein to you.

Just landed via Messenger:

Pro Tip: Never make snow angels in a dog park.

Going viral on Snapchat:

Sleeping in now means waking up without the alarm clock, but still at the same time.

It’s like 10,000 steps when all you need is a nap.

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It’s like 10,000 steps when all you need is a nap.
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Commentary:
"Trying to adult be like: taking 10,000 steps when all you really want is a nap. 💤🚶‍♂️ #AdultingStruggles"

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

29 shares on Twitch this month:

Controlling your emotions while on your period is an extreme sport.

26 shares on Messenger this month:

Social media is a great way to make new enemies.

87 shares on Threads this month:

Tuesday is no better than Monday.

52 shares on Slack this month:

It’s easy to keep me happy: feed me sunshine in summer — and keep me warm in winter.

64 shares on Facebook this month:

I love being home and doing absolutely nothing and never contributing to society.

40 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Getting road rage alone in my house.

91 shares on Threads this month:

Good morning. I’m ready for attention now.

75 shares on Reddit this month:

First responders? You mean reply guys?

69 shares on TikTok this month:

When I don’t have money, I stop talking to women out of respect.

79 shares on Twitch this month:

Shit posting is cheaper than therapy.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

10 folks are currently checking 👀

I was explaining to my Ukrainian colleague the phrase ‘There’s no such thing as a free lunch’. She told me the equivalent in Ukrainian is ‘The only free cheese is in the mousetrap’ — which is so much better.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m so desperate for a vacation that at this point I’d spend an all inclusive week at Jurassic Park.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

I miss the old days back in the 70s, when I didn’t exist.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

I haven’t had sex in so long, I forgot how to moan, what if I mess up and bark?

20 folks are currently checking 👀

The subtle art of surviving this life with grace and dignity.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

When someone tells me “They could care less”, instead of the proper “I couldn’t care less”, I always say “At least you care.”

24 folks are currently checking 👀

If I walk into a girl’s house and she got like 50 plants, I know she’s a keeper because she already takes care of a bunch of useless things. What’s one more?

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Packed all my meds into one bottle for a trip and accidentally invented the best trail mix.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

This pillow isn’t going to scream into itself.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

I don’t do exercise because one time I kneed myself in the face doing a burpee.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,462

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇱 has copied:

Forgot my glasses, so I’m pointing at a random spot on the menu and hoping for the best.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has copied:

This chapter of my life is called ‘at least the rent is paid’

Someone from 🇧🇯 has downloaded:

If a government has online beef with a pop star, it has already lost.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has shared:

Startup idea: Instagram, but it only shows you posts from people you follow, and they’re in chronological order.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has shared:

Sorry, can’t go out tonight. My bed told me it needs me, and I can’t let it down.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has shared:

I asked myself if I was toxic and we said no.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has viewed:

Is this art or trash?

Someone from 🇩🇪 has bookmarked:

Somewhere on our planet, there is someone who doesn’t care about you at this moment. It could be billions.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has viewed:

I accidentally hit a parked car, so I left them a note that said “next time it will be you”.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has copied:

Twitter is where the broken, the used, the fighters, and the lovers gather to appreciate the twisted beauty in one another.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Messenger:

I’m not well rested. Sleeping Beauty was well rested.

Just landed via Pinterest:

Shoutout to everyone pretending to have it together. Same.

Broadcasted on Twitch:

I did some exercise in 2010, I should be good for another few years.

Going viral on Facebook:

If I’m giving you attention, feel blessed. My real passion is ignoring people.

Seen just now on Discord:

“I’m disgusted by how many of you still use Spotify. I use a fair trade, ethically conscientious mom-and-pop platform called Apple Music.”

Just landed via WhatsApp:

My mom asked me to hand out invitations for my brother’s surprise birthday party, and that’s when I realized he was the favorite twin.

Live now on Instagram:

One minute you’re young and wild, the next minute you’re into air fryers.

Going viral on X:

Hold on, let me overthink this.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Don’t believe in yourself, you can’t do it.

Just landed via Snapchat:

You have been a very bad boy. Now go to my room!

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