Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇾🇪 has downloaded:

Every year, just in time for Christmas, when it’s freezing cold, the Coca Cola truck shows up. Now, in this freaking heat, it’s nowhere to be seen.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has viewed:

I don’t really like the song “I’ve Got a Feeling” by Black Eyed Peas, but I just like the part where they say “Mazel Tov.”

Someone from 🇦🇸 has copied:

I hate being at the age where you feel obligated to buy your whole family gifts for Christmas, but also the age where your bank account doesn’t feel obligated to support that.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has bookmarked:

My body is a machine that turns traumatic experiences into 10 likes on X.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has copied:

When I hear the word “horror”, the first thing I think of is bills, not Halloween.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has bookmarked:

Imagine you blocked me, and I crawled out from under your couch to ask why.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has bookmarked:

School reunion is a scam… nobody is missing anyone, they just want to know whether you have made it in life or not.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has copied:

I’m not lazy, I’m an inactivist.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has copied:

Women pretending not to see men staring at them is an essential survival skill.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has copied:

People believe that they have brains but maybe that’s just inside their heads.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 19, 2026

Users Online

3,377

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Messenger:

Ever since I learned about the concept of networking, I knew I was going to have to do everything alone and do it the hard way.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

White elephant: Nothing brings people together like fighting over absolute garbage.

Just landed via TikTok:

Sorry, I liked your post one second after you posted it but in my defense, I’ve had my phone in my hand since 2012.

Shared recently on Messenger:

I’m glad laughter is the best medicine because my insurance sucks.

Live now on YouTube:

For a guy with no reflection, Dracula’s eyeliner is always flawless.

Spotted on Discord:

I have been putting a lot of thought into it, and I just don’t think being an adult is going to work for me.

Spotted on Discord:

A web developer and an SEO expert walk into a bar, bars, nightclub, pubs, tavern, beer, alcohol, drinks, alcoholic beverages, bars in my area, places to drink.

Spotted on Discord:

“Don’t take this the wrong way!” Translation: Prepare for insult.

Shared recently on Discord:

Light is faster than sound. That’s why people seem so bright until you hear them talk.

Shared recently on Discord:

Driving is great because it combines my love of sitting with my love of being mad.

Karma not moving fast enough for me. I would hate to handle it myself, Lord.

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Commentary:
"Looks like even Karma is lagging behind schedule for some quick justice! 🕰️ Don't worry, I'm sure the universe will catch up… eventually. Maybe invest in some patience in the meantime! 😅⏳"

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Keep the laugh going 😂

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Funny Quotes Collections
✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

56 shares on Pinterest this month:

UK rappers be like “I’ve got a posh flat and my bird is very comely, I own more motors than the marchioness of cholmondeley”

23 shares on Pinterest this month:

Absent father sucks, but have you met the final boss, the father who is actually in your life every day but emotionally unavailable, lol.

93 shares on WeChat this month:

Telling a child not to touch something only ensures that child is definitely now going to touch that something.

65 shares on TikTok this month:

I think probably the reason some people look better at 30 than at 20 is because they’re wealthier.

39 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Gonna tell my dentist that if I’m late, he should start without me.

45 shares on YouTube this month:

Nobody flirts better than a girl with zero interest.

70 shares on X this month:

Every time your mom tells you that she wants the best for you, she is talking about me.

34 shares on Messenger this month:

When you ask for your phone charger back and your teenager has the audacity to ask “what percentage are you on?”

67 shares on X this month:

The hardest part of corporate life is pretending to care about things that don’t matter.

69 shares on Snapchat this month:

My husband and I were doing yard work, but I started a fight so I could storm off into the air conditioning.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Glasses don’t make you look smart, everyone knows you had to fail a test to get them.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

If anything I post makes you mad, just know that it pleases me.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Keep your fries close and your onion rings closer.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

White guys have a slur for other white guys they don’t respect, it’s called ‘buddy.’

21 folks are currently checking 👀

I don’t think I’m allowed to be in public for over an hour.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

I try not to laugh at my own jokes, but we all know I’m hilarious.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

“I’m interested in the divorce rate for couples who sleep in queen versus king beds.”

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Due to inflation, you can now eat food that has been on the floor for up to 7.3 seconds.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

People should be allowed to leave work early if they want to go see a movie.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

At my age, I see no good reason to act my age.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 19, 2026

Users Online

3,366

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇹 has bookmarked:

Sorry you thought I I was flirting with you; I had something in my eye.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has viewed:

The most productive species of beaver is the Eager.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has viewed:

Pet owners be like “this is my pet Snoopy, but their nicknames are Booboo and Thicky Boy!”

Someone from 🇦🇩 has shared:

My dog just looked me in the eye and said “no one is gonna believe you”, then took a nap.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has bookmarked:

I said it was my favorite show, I didn’t say it was good.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has copied:

Remember, for some unknown reason Santa doesn’t make batteries.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has shared:

Dating app that matches you based on your risk tolerance for airport arrival timing.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has downloaded:

People who can’t tell the difference between whole numbers and decimals are missing the point.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has bookmarked:

Sending messages is easy. Living with them forever is the hard part.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has copied:

Sometimes you send an email that requires a response, and the other person writes back right away, and it’s like NO NOT YET.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on WhatsApp:

Salary week, but salary weak.

Seen just now on Messenger:

It’s so important to warm up before any physical activity, like getting out of bed.

Just shared via Telegram:

Why procrastinate now when you can always procrastinate later?

Making waves on Facebook:

A late person is never happier than when the person they’re meeting is later than them.

Going viral on Snapchat:

If you have an old house, but you haven’t got a ghost, you should complain to the estate agent.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

I’m begging for a day to be added in between Saturday and Sunday.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

I have to work because the baby is expensive. (I’m the baby.)

Seen just now on X:

Showering & getting in bed is literally one of the best combos ever.

Just shared via YouTube:

Sorry about my behavior as of late. I have plastic in my brain.

Going viral on Threads:

When one door closes, lock it securely, along with all your other doors and windows, before any inspirational quotes get in.

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