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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇫🇮 has downloaded:

Isn’t it weird we have a little voice in our head, like the one you’re using to read this?

Someone from 🇱🇨 has bookmarked:

I need to consult the woods about this.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has shared:

The collective noun for a group of reply guys is an audacity.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has copied:

It sucks when you realize it’s only Thursday, until you realize it’s only Wednesday.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has viewed:

Men playing hard to get when they’re already hard to want, is so funny to me.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has downloaded:

I’m like a semicolon, most people don’t know what to do with me.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has bookmarked:

There’s something about Dracula I just don’t trust.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has shared:

Sorry for what I said when I was drunk. I meant every word.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has downloaded:

When I say I’m tired, the “of people” is silent.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has shared:

I try to contain my craziness, but the lid keeps popping off.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

215 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,484

Funny Quotes Topics

17,554

Funny Quotes Images

15,484

Updated

Jan 5, 2026

Users Online

3,400

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on YouTube:

Your twenties are for destroying and betraying yourself for nothing.

Going viral on Threads:

Every girl’s personal hell is being too excited about their birthday and it ends up being the worst day ever.

Spotted on YouTube:

The only joke my mom ever made was me.

Live now on WhatsApp:

Adulting: unlocking life’s mysteries, one therapy session at a time.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

Sorry I can’t have a pleasant, safe and affordable life, my government said no.

Seen just now on Instagram:

No matter how much Polynesian food you eat, you always want Samoa.

Making waves on X:

Don’t bother telling me where you’re from, I have no geographical knowledge and no sense of direction.

Going bananas on Telegram:

If you add orange juice to Jason Momoa, you get a Jason Mimosa.

Just landed via Pinterest:

I was born a boy, but according to the packaging, I identify as a family of four.

Broadcasted on Discord:

Cinderella had one night out, and it changed her life. I had one night out, and it changed my credit score.

Most earthquakes could have been an email.

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Most earthquakes could have been an email.
Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Earthquakes be like: 'Did you really need to shake things up, when a simple email would have sufficed? 📧💥' #tremorcommunications"

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

22 shares on Slack this month:

Body: Okay, sleepy time. Brain: Okay, thinky time.

77 shares on Pinterest this month:

People that tell us what sex gods they are, what do you want us to do with that information?

26 shares on TikTok this month:

If you have ever spent an hour on Twitter then you understand why there’s such an urgency to create Artificial Intelligence.

44 shares on Snapchat this month:

Called in, “Hey, macarena!” this morning.

82 shares on Reddit this month:

My stomach just made the exact sound of the “your” in “your call has been forwarded to an automatic voice messaging system.”

73 shares on Threads this month:

Oh, to live in simpler times, when there was nothing to do but sit by the seashore and contemplate the miracle of existence.

83 shares on Twitch this month:

If anyone wants to watch the Super Bowl on a large 8k TV, come on over to my place (and bring a large 8k TV).

20 shares on Facebook this month:

Socialism isn’t wrong because it has compassion. It’s wrong because it doesn’t work.

27 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I asked my boyfriend if he believed in trolls and elves and he said, “slightly.”

11 shares on Twitch this month:

I hope “be the light you want to see in the world” doesn’t refer to Molotov Cocktails.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

6 folks are currently checking 👀

“Are you seeing anyone,” like hallucinating?

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Forget carrying me to bed; carry me to the end of the workweek. Then we can talk.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Pretending to be a well-adjusted, functioning adult is so exhausting.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Painted a big H in my garden to see if I can trap a helicopter. Wish me luck!

6 folks are currently checking 👀

You can’t confuse me. I already don’t know what’s going on.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Fake laughing with customers is actually a job skill.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Teaching myself ukulele! Neighbor keeping the beat on my wall!

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Hold on, I just need to take off my glasses and put my face in my hands about it first.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Of course I wrote a grocery list. I carefully wrote it all down and then didn’t bring it with me, like my mother and her mother before her.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Turning in bad essays to professors you have a personal relationship with is the most humiliating thing ever.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

215 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,484

Funny Quotes Topics

17,554

Funny Quotes Images

15,484

Updated

Jan 5, 2026

Users Online

3,680

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇷 has copied:

I know I’m almost 40 because I had a few drinks last night and woke up this morning thinking: Oh no I bought so many socks online last night.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has shared:

Halloween is over and most people just keep on being creepy.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has downloaded:

My main career goal at the moment is to find a big bag of money in the woods.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has bookmarked:

Life so stupid, I just want a burger and to be held.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has downloaded:

Due to personal reasons, I’ve decided to become your problem.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has viewed:

Mini skirts are so cute and fun, like, oops, my ass is out.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has copied:

Why does everyone always think that I know what I’m doing? Most of the time I watch myself in amazement and am curious to see what happens.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has copied:

Jacket I left on a chair that sometimes looks like a person at night stuns in new evening nightmare.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has copied:

Note to self: Very important! First hang up, then insult.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has viewed:

Ladies, don’t date hungry guys. They’re just trying to get into your pantries.

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

Everything is awful, and no one is going to save you from this treacherous world. Oops, I mean, happy Friday!

Just landed via YouTube:

The greatest allies fascism and genocide have are the people who say, “I don’t follow the news, it’s too depressing.”

Making waves on Threads:

I now have Taylor Swift as my alarm. Now I always wake up five minutes earlier so I don’t have to listen to it.

Seen just now on Twitch:

It’s important that everyone takes really good pictures of me this summer.

Live now on TikTok:

My favorite Slipknot member is the one who wears the mask.

Trending via LinkedIn:

It’s Friday. Rules don’t apply.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

I may not know what’s going on, but I also have no idea what’s happening.

Just landed via Twitch:

Love to go to hipster restaurants and eat half a grilled cheese off an old license plate.

Going bananas on YouTube:

Remind the demons under your bed that you’re the landlord, raise the rent.

Shared recently on Threads:

Just had a salad but it didn’t make me laugh like women in stock photos.

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