Wordgag 🎅

Commentary:
"Looks like your Discman was too delicate to handle your need for speed! 🏃‍♂️🎧 Maybe it was just trying to stay 'un-shaken, not stirred' like a true secret agent."

Discman, exercise, humor, nostalgia, past, running, shake, slow, speed, technology

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I love having plans to cancel.

0

5 months ago

cancel, cancellation, having, humor, i, introvert, life, love, plan, plans, social, social life
I miss getting my misinformation from less places.

0

2 months ago

communication, getting, humor, i, irony, less, media, misinformation, miss, nostalgia, places
Everyone’s “the nicest guy ever” until the cops are in their backyard digging up several bodies.

0

1 month ago

backyard, body, cops, crime, dark, dark humor, deception, digging, ever, guy, humor, police, reputation, sarcasm
My thighs are bigger than my chances in life.

0

2 months ago

body, body image, chances, confidence, humor, image, life, self-deprecation, thigh
Just had a crazy revelation: you can eat in the airport after your flight, too.

0

1 month ago

after, airport, crazy, eat, eating, flight, food, funny realization, humor, just, realization, revelation, too, travel, travel humor
The list of women who haven’t slept with me is really impressive.

0

2 months ago

confidence, dating, humor, impressive, list, me, relationships, sleep, women

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎁🎅🎄 Christmas Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

54 shares on Discord this month:

Due to unfortunate circumstances, things are no longer fergalicious nor bootylicious.

10 shares on Instagram this month:

Very confusing that gross pay is before tax. I always find the number way grosser after tax.

48 shares on Messenger this month:

Television is better for you than phone. It is like vaping vs smoking.

26 shares on Telegram this month:

When did making sense stop making sense?

85 shares on Snapchat this month:

My dream is being pitted against the world’s greatest AI in a writing contest and crafting a story that’s so beautiful that I make the computer cry.

72 shares on Twitch this month:

Duolingo should have an “I’m going on holiday to this place very soon” setting so it teaches you “can I have the bill” and so on instead of “the cow boils an egg”.

24 shares on TikTok this month:

Good morning, dickhead, your little ray of sarcastic sunshine has arrived.

32 shares on Slack this month:

Don’t worry, better days are coming. They are called Friday, Saturday and Sunday.

88 shares on Snapchat this month:

Bring me a higher love. You have 24 hours. No cops.

79 shares on Threads this month:

Neighbors are fighting. Can I knock on the wall and ask them to speak up so I know whose side I’m on?

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇴 has bookmarked:

My fantasy is having two men at once. One cooking, one cleaning.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has downloaded:

Lazy Rule: Can’t reach it, don’t need it.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has shared:

Bro, did you really just mix up e.g. and i.e. in front of the hoes?

Someone from 🇸🇻 has shared:

Most women need a little reassurance. Like when she says “oh, you want to see crazy?” Reassure her that you do not.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has downloaded:

I don’t know who needs to hear this, but that much caffeine can’t be good for you.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has copied:

My patience is like a gift card, not sure how much is left but lets give it a try.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has viewed:

89% of the time when my husband tells me I look great, what he really means is, “We needed to leave five minutes ago.”

Someone from 🇷🇴 has downloaded:

When I die I want people to say “Hmm, I didn’t know you could die like that.”

Someone from 🇧🇸 has downloaded:

Funny thing about zombie movies – they never seem to go after the cameraman.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has viewed:

My spirit animal is a sloth on its fourth nap of the day!

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Pinterest:

The only joke my mom ever made was me.

Just shared via YouTube:

I’ll make you feel safe in that you’ll know you can outrun me if we are being chased by a murderer.

Breaking via Messenger:

“Male loneliness epidemic” and it’s just karma and the consequences of their actions.

Live now on Instagram:

The bad news is there was a lot of turbulence on my flight this morning. The good news is my phone counted it as steps.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

Lord of the Rings is a story about a brave little Hobbit on a mission to destroy a ring and save the world, and his annoying friend Frodo.

Spotted on Facebook:

A dating app for people who suck at flirting called Fumble.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

I put on my Godzilla costume, then go to the miniature golf course to beat up the windmill.

Going bananas on Twitch:

Maybe Monday is more scared of us than we are of it… we don’t know.

Live now on X:

Once you understand why pizza is made round, packed in square boxes, and eaten as a triangle, then you will understand women.

Going viral on Discord:

Is this simulation from Temu?

Wordgag 🎅

Activity Log ✨

My running speed is very slow because the Discman wasn’t allowed to shake in the past.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

I love having plans to cancel.

I miss getting my misinformation from less places.

Everyone’s “the nicest guy ever” until the cops are in their backyard digging up several bodies.

My thighs are bigger than my chances in life.

Just had a crazy revelation: you can eat in the airport after your flight, too.

The list of women who haven’t slept with me is really impressive.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨