Someone from 🇪🇹 has downloaded:

Whitening my teeth by getting a tan.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has bookmarked:

Hmm, that’s a bit too harsh. Let me put “lol” at the end of it.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has viewed:

At least 80% of my day is spent holding back my inappropriate thoughts.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has viewed:

“Comparison is the thief of joy!” Well, not if you’re better than everyone else.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has copied:

I did not attend his funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has bookmarked:

Here’s your daily reminder to not forget about Dre.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has downloaded:

Monsters can’t hide under my bed. That’s where my cats have their fight club.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has shared:

Good things happen when you smile or when you’re naked.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has viewed:

My plans for today? Same as always: drink coffee and be sexy.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has copied:

Non-parents be like: I would simply instruct the toddler to do something he doesn’t want to do, and he would obey.