Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Looks like someone's mouth clocked in for work before their brain did! 😂👄 Sending thoughts and prayers for a speedy recovery from the sassy syndrome! 🙏"

attitude, humor, i, lord, me, mouth, office, oh, prayers, sarcasm, sass, today, work

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

You call it nagging, I call it ‘listen to what I said the first time!’

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2 months ago

call, communication, humor, i, irony, listen, nagging, relationship, time
Babies invented being in a bad mood for no reason, and they continue to innovate in the field.

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2 months ago

baby, bad, bad mood, field, humor, innovation, mood, reason
First World War. Kind of nervous.

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2 months ago

first world war, history, humor, joke, kind, nervous, war, world
At the art museum walking slower and observing more than anyone else.

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2 months ago

activity, appreciation, art, art appreciation, date, else, fun, fun activity, humor, museum, observing, pace, slow, slow pace, walking
The plant app says that I either watered my plant too much or not enough. Very helpful. Thanks!

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2 months ago

app, care, confusion, gardening, helpful, humor, i, much, plant, thanks, too, watered
We hate the same people and it’s so romantic.

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2 months ago

couple, couple humor, hate, hatred, humor, humor quote, people, relationships, romance, romantic, same, sarcasm

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

32 shares on Messenger this month:

Tested positive for needing a kiss.

94 shares on Threads this month:

My neighbor told me he heard me having sex this morning. I was putting on my shoes.

83 shares on LinkedIn this month:

In an effort to keep our house clean before Thanksgiving, I’ve asked my family to go live somewhere else.

24 shares on Twitch this month:

Whatever the plot is in Barbie’s movie, my dolls have been through worse.

33 shares on Snapchat this month:

Books are so cool because there are no bloody ads in them.

57 shares on Twitch this month:

Valentine’s Day this week. If you have a crush on me we still have time to get cards and shave.

61 shares on Discord this month:

My son loves Monty Python. My work here is done.

97 shares on Slack this month:

Yes, my sex drive is higher than my will to live, and what about it?

64 shares on X this month:

I’d like to thank the municipal snow plow for recreating the wall from Game of Thrones at the end of my driveway.

91 shares on Messenger this month:

I bet she doesn’t even laugh at your dumb jokes the fake way I did.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇦 has downloaded:

You don’t have to be crazy to hang out with me. I’ll train you.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has bookmarked:

There should be bloopers at the end of horror films to relax the viewer before sleeping.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has shared:

Careful, “friend”. One more word about Shakira and you might find out just how fast I can draw this blade.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has bookmarked:

Super excited about a brand new week of questioning all my life choices.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has bookmarked:

My hair would never allow me to commit a crime. I really do leave my DNA everywhere.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has copied:

Girls are happier when their dress has pockets, it’s science.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has viewed:

I watch “Law and Order” so much that when I turn off the TV, I wipe my fingerprints off the remote.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has copied:

My dad thought Siri would be more helpful finding a lemon ricotta recipe if he used an Italian accent.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has copied:

No, they’re not “symptoms of depressions.” They’re Blue’s Clues.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has copied:

Took a bunch of Ibuprofen to keep my posts from being too inflammatory.

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Instagram:

I found my first grey pubic hair today, but I didn’t freak out; unlike everyone else in the Zoom meeting.

Going bananas on Reddit:

Imagine if spiders giggled when they ran away from us.

Trending via Slack:

Wish I could get paid just for being a sweetheart.

Going viral on Facebook:

I’ll never be badass enough to walk around chewing on a toothpick.

Seen just now on Instagram:

I deserve a love so pure that my nervous system can finally rest.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

Your ex is ruining someone else’s life now. You are safe.

Making waves on Instagram:

There’s no-one who can get more drunk on power than the admin of a village Facebook group.

Just landed via WeChat:

I’m a big fan of that post-laundry feeling when you’ve got all your A-list clothes back in the game.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

Imagine if we had to worry about dinosaurs too, on top of everything else.

Broadcasted on Messenger:

Starting a new show sucks. Who are these people?

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Oh, lord. I brought my mouth with me to work today and it’s all sass. Prayers, please.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

You call it nagging, I call it ‘listen to what I said the first time!’

Babies invented being in a bad mood for no reason, and they continue to innovate in the field.

First World War. Kind of nervous.

At the art museum walking slower and observing more than anyone else.

The plant app says that I either watered my plant too much or not enough. Very helpful. Thanks!

We hate the same people and it’s so romantic.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨