Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Who needs two night stands when you can barely handle one? 🤔 Let's save some space for the important stuff – like a whole collection of mismatched socks under the bed! 🧦😂"

bed, both, humor, just, logic, need, night, night stand, one-night stand, people, relationship, sense, sides, single, stand

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Some say the world will end in fire. Others say in ice. Coming up next, our expert panel breaks down the arguments for each side…

2 months ago

apocalyptic, argument, arguments, breaks, comedy, coming, debate, end, end of world, expert, expert panel, fire, humor, ice, next, others, panel, satire, say, side, world
I wonder if my guardian angel and my future husband’s guardian angel are in a group chat trying to coordinate.

2 months ago

angel, chat, coordination, fate, future, future husband, group, group chat, guardian, guardian angel, humor, husband, i, love, relationship, trying, wonder
My toxic trait is binging a show too fast, then getting sad when I have nothing to watch.

2 months ago

binge, binge-watching, entertainment, fast, getting, habit, i, nothing, sad, sadness, sery, show, too, toxic, toxic trait, trait, TV, TV sery, watch, watching
I just agree with people so that they stop talking.

2 months ago

agree, agreement, avoidance, conversation, humor, i, interaction, just, people, social, social interaction, stop, talking
If insomnia were a sport, I’d have endorsement deals.

2 months ago

deals, endorsement, humor, ID, insomnia, joke, sleep, sport
I love my bed so much, what a place.

2 months ago

bed, comfort, humor, i, love, much, place, relaxation

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

60 shares on X this month:

Take my advice, I’m not using it.

73 shares on Pinterest this month:

I only drink when I people.

62 shares on Messenger this month:

Writers should get a direct line to the FBI so we can call them and give them a heads up when we’re googling ways to poison someone but just for a story.

78 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Who needs an alarm clock when you have a bladder.

85 shares on Facebook this month:

If I was a star and you were a star, I would wink at you and blink at you and twinkle at you and the earthlings would call it science.

52 shares on Reddit this month:

I don’t like being asked “are you at home?” Please expand further so I can know whether I’m at home or not.

82 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Just because I’m up sharing posts at 7 a.m. doesn’t mean I’m up. Don’t call my phone.

97 shares on Pinterest this month:

Why do plane tickets have to be so expensive? You’re literally going that way anyway. Just give me a ride.

65 shares on WeChat this month:

All these microplastics in me could at least do some repair work to my knees and back while they’re in there.

17 shares on WeChat this month:

There is no bigger lie than “fun for the whole family”.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇰 has downloaded:

Thanks to AI, some of us went from being told by our parents not to trust the internet to having to tell our parents not to trust the internet.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has downloaded:

Stop being so boyfriendable if you can’t be my boyfriend.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has shared:

If you’re riding in my car, that little middle piece is for my elbow — not yours.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has bookmarked:

Sorry I said your toddler should be in commercials for birth control.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has bookmarked:

The worst person to share a room with is someone who puts on 10 alarms 2 mins apart each, and wakes up at none.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has downloaded:

I love when I clean my whole apartment just to sit in it like a Victorian widow waiting for bad news.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has viewed:

The Face ID on my phone won’t work until it sees the loss of hope in my eyes.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has bookmarked:

Sorry, I can’t come over tonight. I’ve become too invested in these fictional characters and whether or not they will kiss.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has copied:

We were having tea with my mother-in-law the other day and out of the blue she said, “I’ve decided I want to be cremated.” I said, “Alright, get your coat.”

Someone from 🇫🇮 has downloaded:

How did Satoshi write the code of Bitcoin before Claude?

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via LinkedIn:

I always thought that aunts had a lot of money. Until I became one myself.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

It’s obvious now that democracy is a busted flush and that in future politicians should be selected via several rigorous rounds of Taskmaster.

Just landed via Telegram:

If you really wanna piss someone off when introducing them, make little finger quotation marks in the air when announcing their job title.

Trending via Pinterest:

Coffee ain’t cutting it anymore. I need to eat batteries.

Going bananas on WeChat:

A real smart TV would increase the volume when you started eating chips.

Just shared via Instagram:

Brainwashing is always considered terrible and horrible. But there are many brains that would benefit from a wash.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

Nothing is funnier than seeing how angry someone gets when they realize they can’t manipulate you.

Spotted on Pinterest:

There are too many movies about vampire hunters and not enough about vampire gatherers.

Shared recently on X:

To all of you who have never tried blindfold archery: You don’t know what you’re missing!

Breaking via WhatsApp:

You’re in his DMs, so am I, but I am way funnier.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

One night stands just make more sense for single people. Why would you need a night stand on both sides of the bed?

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Some say the world will end in fire. Others say in ice. Coming up next, our expert panel breaks down the arguments for each side…

I wonder if my guardian angel and my future husband’s guardian angel are in a group chat trying to coordinate.

My toxic trait is binging a show too fast, then getting sad when I have nothing to watch.

I just agree with people so that they stop talking.

If insomnia were a sport, I’d have endorsement deals.

I love my bed so much, what a place.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨