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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇦 has copied:

Sometimes I feel useless but then I remember I breath out carbon dioxide for plants.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has bookmarked:

It’s interesting growing up and learning that most adults are not smart. I had my suspicions as a kid, but I didn’t think the situation was this dire.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has shared:

My signature move is always learning my lessons the hard way.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has viewed:

They all cheat, lie and manipulate. Just pick the pretty one.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has bookmarked:

Teens are like, “My homework isn’t done, but check out this presentation I made on why I need Instagram.”

Someone from 🇧🇿 has copied:

People who remember to drink water, what’s that like?

Someone from 🇨🇭 has copied:

The Gen Z stare. The millennial pause. Instead, let’s talk about the boomer inappropriate personal question.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has downloaded:

I get jealous when I find someone playing a song I thought only I knew.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has bookmarked:

I don’t like talking to people with an IQ lower than the room temperature.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has shared:

Of course women need more pockets, where are we supposed to hold all of our grudges?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,716

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on LinkedIn:

My mom: sure use any towel. Also my mom: not that one.

Seen just now on Threads:

Your Majesty” would be the best name for a cat.

Going viral on Slack:

Setting up a camera to go and pretend you just woke up from bed is another level of mental illness.

Spreading quickly via Slack:

Where do I sign up to be one of those influencers with 2M followers whose whole thing is just standing in front of other people’s content and nodding?

Freshly posted on Twitch:

I hope this 17th text in a row with no response finds you well.

Just landed via Instagram:

If you want to make God laugh, inhale some helium then tell Him your plans.

Shared recently on Instagram:

The second half of your life begins when you stop wanting to get even and start wanting to get odd.

Freshly posted on X:

What are cats even trying to do?

Seen just now on WeChat:

The last time I said I wanted to try missionary, she sent me to a remote village in Africa.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

Have to write a note to my kid’s first grade teacher, and now I’m stressed out about my handwriting.

Panda bears are proof that it’s okay to be kind of an idiot as long as you’re super adorable.

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Panda bears are proof that it’s okay to be kind of an idiot as long as you’re super adorable.
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Commentary:
"Panda bears: setting the bar high for being cute and clueless at the same time 🐼🤪 Who knew being a lovable goofball could be so endearing? It's like they're saying 'I may not be the brightest bulb in the box, but hey, look at my fluffy cuteness!' 😆🐼 #PandaWisdom"

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

92 shares on Telegram this month:

It’s so hot outside that when I opened my front door I thought I was checking on my oven.

13 shares on Discord this month:

The knife is my brush, the jam my paint and the toast my canvas.

72 shares on Snapchat this month:

People need to understand the difference between want and need. Like, I want abs, but I need chocolate.

18 shares on TikTok this month:

“I’m not concerned about Netflix buying Warner Brothers. None of this will matter once we evolve gills and start living underwater.”

53 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Relationship goal: synchronizing our eye rolls.

84 shares on Pinterest this month:

Who called it a Cybertruck and not a Deplorean?

88 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I’m not always annoying, sometimes I sleep too.

26 shares on Twitch this month:

Playing dumb for five minutes often saves a lot of work.

38 shares on Pinterest this month:

Having Twitter is just like reading the newspaper, except the newspaper is on fire and all the writers hate you.

16 shares on YouTube this month:

Should we all just give up and get really into drugs? Wait, this is literally what happened in the 60s. That just clicked for me.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

16 folks are currently checking 👀

I just bought a universal remote. This changes everything.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

An apple a day may keep the doctor away, but some silly a day keeps the boredom at bay.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

“Work smarter, not harder.” Brother, I’m not doing either of those things.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Santa saw your Facebook posts. This year you’re getting a dictionary.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m changing the game. I’m starting to thank people from the top of my heart.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Being drunk and liking every tweet without reading it.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

I love sleeping. You don’t spend any money and you don’t miss anyone.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

There’s nothing I hate more than a failed nap attempt.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m quitting my job to do topless tarot readings on the beach.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Waiting patiently for something good to happen, like that goat in Jurassic Park.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,249

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇾 has copied:

If you think swimming with dolphins is expensive, you should try swimming with sharks. It cost me an arm and a leg!

Someone from 🇰🇭 has bookmarked:

Enemies to lovers is only good if they’re gay. If I wanted to see a man and a woman yell at each other, I’d just go downstairs and eat with my parents.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has copied:

Lord of the Rings is a story about a brave little Hobbit on a mission to destroy a ring and save the world, and his annoying friend Frodo.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has bookmarked:

“Devil’s advocate” implies the existence of heaven’s prosecutor.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has downloaded:

I’m not just a pretty face, I’m also a massive disappointment to my family.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has shared:

If we ever make eye contact, just know I imagined way too much already.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has viewed:

Anyone else smile at old people just to show that you’re one of the good ones.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has bookmarked:

Before you send that email, ask yourself: is this a December problem or a January problem?

Someone from 🇲🇺 has downloaded:

I want to be cremated so that I will get a smoking-hot body again.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has downloaded:

Netflix and chi…cken nuggets.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on YouTube:

I love coming home and being at home and sitting inside my home and staying home.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

Divorcing my wife to focus on my porn addiction.

Spotted on Slack:

Country music is for men who need a little help crying.

Just landed via Discord:

Naming my first daughter Piggleigh Wiggleigh.

Just landed via Twitch:

Why hasn’t Lululemon created a bra-line named Lulumelons?

Freshly posted on Slack:

I haven’t broken a mirror lately, but my water broke and I’ve had seven years of kids crawling into my bed.

Just shared via Pinterest:

Іf you’re sad about being alone on Valentine’s Day, just remember that nobody loves you on any other day of the year either.

Just landed via Twitch:

That awkward moment between birth and death.

Making waves on Twitch:

Getting up early would be easier if we could keep our eyes closed.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

I kind of can’t wait for my generation to be bumping 90’s hip hop, rap, and heavy metal at the old folks’ homes.

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