Trendy Funny Quotes

  • My mom sent me a text message so long I had to refill my Adderall prescription to read it.
  • Before you marry a person, you should first make them use a computer with slow internet to see who they really are.
  • People always talk about how they love to sit in their cars for a while once they get home. Whenever I do that, my Uber driver yells at me.
  • My insurance company said if my tent is stolen while I’m camping, I won’t be covered.
  • A diamond is forever, and so is my teen’s grudge against me for some random stuff every other day.
  • Dear razor commercials, please stop shaving hairless legs. If you want to impress someone, shave a gorilla.