Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • Dear Santa, I’ve been good all year. Most of the time. Once in a while. Never mind, I’ll buy my own stuff.
  • Whenever you are feeling down, remember you’re the sperm that won.
  • The best way to enjoy your tea while the world is falling apart around you is to remember that the world has always been falling apart around you.
  • I don’t like violence, but I don’t mind if I get hit by luck.
  • I don’t hate you, but I hope you run out of hot water before you’re finished your shower.
  • My Christmas letter this year includes a bonus DVD of my colonoscopy.