Welcome to your 40s: here’s an extra chin.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has downloaded:

Why is it called the Super Bowl if no one is bowling?

Someone from 🇰🇲 has shared:

Paid my mortgage so don’t ask me to come out. I’m getting my money’s worth.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has downloaded:

I’ll never salute you, General Settings.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has bookmarked:

If you call me from a private number, I’ll respect your privacy and won’t answer.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has shared:

It’s not about the cards you’re dealt, but how you play the hand you’ve got hidden up your sleeve.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has bookmarked:

There should be a calorie refund for food that didn’t taste as good as you expected.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has downloaded:

I wonder if it’s possible to swim from one end to the other in a pool filled with mashed potatoes.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has bookmarked:

Me at a nightclub: Where are the chairs?

Someone from 🇦🇸 has copied:

Camping: When you spend a small fortune to live like somebody poor.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has copied:

If you’re too open-minded, your brains will fall out.