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Commentary:
"Before coffee: a mysterious blend of grumpy, confused, and not-to-be-disturbed… After coffee: a powerhouse of charm, wit, and productivity! ☕️😄 Embrace the transformation – caffeine is the real magic potion!"

before, coffee, humor, morning, morning routine, personality, real, real you, routine

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Social Media Stars ⭐

79 shares on Discord this month:

Caught my son chewing on electrical wires. So, I grounded him. He’s doing better currently and conducting himself properly.

39 shares on Slack this month:

Always tell people different stories about yourself, so when they talk about you, they’ll argue.

32 shares on Facebook this month:

There are so many people going to hell. I’m thinking of investing in some property there.

18 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Nothing ruins a Friday like realizing it’s only Wednesday.

89 shares on Messenger this month:

I love my new crockpot. Now we can wait longer to eat my horrible cooking.

20 shares on Slack this month:

Many fruits can be great names… but the real challenge is naming a child after a vegetable….

20 shares on Discord this month:

Smoking weed and watching music videos as the hangout is a lost art.

15 shares on Snapchat this month:

McDonald’s is finally promoting good health by making their food unaffordable.

99 shares on Slack this month:

When I’m dying, please rush me to the nearest haunted house. I don’t want to haunt a shitty apartment by myself.

37 shares on WeChat this month:

Talents: eating!

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇻 has viewed:

There’s something meditative about cleaning. It’s the perfect time to reflect and plan revenge on every single person who has ever wronged you.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has viewed:

The awkward moment when someone’s zipper is down and you don’t know whether to tell them or not.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has viewed:

I want someone to care for me as much as Netflix cares if someone has logged into my account from another device.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has copied:

I hate when people say “It could be worse” because it could be better, too.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has downloaded:

Insane that you have to defend yourself at the end of the Ph. D.! Why are you attacking me? I’m so tired.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has downloaded:

When you said “let’s circle back to that in the new year” and now it’s the new year.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has shared:

Stay humble and play dumb. People reveal who they truly are when they think they are smarter than you.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has shared:

Me, first week as a volunteer firefighter thinking we only rescue cats: We’re going where?

Someone from 🇱🇧 has downloaded:

Don’t invite me anywhere in the last minute. I enjoy doing nothing, so I need to know ahead of time if my plan to do nothing needs to be changed.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has downloaded:

Showing your emotions to the wrong people is like bleeding next to a shark.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

Brains are funny. I can remember every word to a song I haven’t heard in 20 years, but I’ve got no clue what my email password is.

Going viral on Discord:

I get it dogs, I wish I could also bark at strangers approaching my house.

Seen just now on Twitch:

Being too stressed isn’t good for the baby. I’m not pregnant though, it’s just that I’m the baby.

Making waves on Pinterest:

How dare you say I’m crazy on the eve of my cat’s wedding?

Breaking via Slack:

Can’t sleep because I keep finding exciting opportunities to get pissed off.

Broadcasted on WeChat:

What no one tells you about having kids is that within a few years you’re in possession of a lot of teeth that you have no idea what to do with.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

Getting sent money you didn’t ask for is very sexy.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

In a parallel universe, I go to bed early and wake up fresh and unstoppable.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Who you are before you have your coffee is the real you.

Love is not pushing them down the stairs when you have the opportunity.

If you’re a squatter, every day is leg day.

It’s interesting growing up and learning that most adults are not smart. I had my suspicions as a kid, but I didn’t think the situation was this dire.

Those eyes ain’t gonna roll itself, let me help you.

Somebody just told me I was living the dream, I can assure you I have never dreamt of this shit right here.

Took a good look at my finances. I won’t make that mistake again.

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Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Who you are before you have your coffee is the real you.

Keep the laugh going 😂

Love is not pushing them down the stairs when you have the opportunity.

If you’re a squatter, every day is leg day.

It’s interesting growing up and learning that most adults are not smart. I had my suspicions as a kid, but I didn’t think the situation was this dire.

Those eyes ain’t gonna roll itself, let me help you.

Somebody just told me I was living the dream, I can assure you I have never dreamt of this shit right here.

Took a good look at my finances. I won’t make that mistake again.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

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