Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇻 has shared:

“My family doesn’t have a black sheep,” I say, while everyone avoids eye contact.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has downloaded:

Girls will be like “it’s fine” then start drawing a pentagram in blood on their floorboards.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has viewed:

Maybe I’ll quit so I can focus on summer.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has shared:

Microdosing bungee jumping by bending over to pick up a hair tie.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has copied:

People call me a “Trekkie,” but I’m not. I’ve only seen Star Wars a couple of times.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has downloaded:

How is rent for 28 days the same amount as for 31 days? Where is my change?

Someone from 🇲🇻 has copied:

If you look close enough, everyone is insane.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has shared:

The first time I saw a kiwi I thought it’s a potato with fur.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has viewed:

The only thing stopping cheesecake from being a breakfast food is you.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has downloaded:

There’s an epidemic of people just staring at their phones in their parked cars.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2413 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,575

Funny Quotes Topics

15,244

Funny Quotes Images

12,575

4 minutes ago

3,437

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Threads:

Spent the day decorating the house for Christmas and my wife spent the day re-decorating the house for Christmas.

Just shared via Snapchat:

I’ve never met a problem I couldn’t make worse.

Just landed via Reddit:

I’ve noticed that when young people now talk about “old people”, they mean me.

Just shared via X:

I’m just here to make you wish I wasn’t.

Shared recently on X:

Becoming a man doesn’t happen the first time you fight or make love. It happens the first time you see the gas bill and remind everyone that we aren’t trying to heat the outside.

Just shared via Reddit:

“Why does my back always hurt?”, I say, while never sitting upright in a chair.

Seen just now on Twitch:

I’m convinced that if Earth explodes, all the cats will land safely on the moon, on their feet.

Spreading quickly via Pinterest:

I thought I needed a drink. Turns out what I really needed was a divorce.

Freshly posted on Slack:

Today, I’m going to give it my almost.

Just shared via YouTube:

Stop wasting your money on beauty products. The secret to looking young is to wear a baseball cap with a propeller on it.

When I say “I’m open to feedback” I mean “I accept compliments.”

5 months ago

When I say “I’m open to feedback” I mean “I accept compliments.”

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Ah, the classic 'I'm open to feedback' dance – where compliments waltz in and critiques get the cold shoulder. It's like saying you're open to new Netflix recommendations when all you really want is someone to tell you how great your taste in shows is. Keep those compliments coming, feedback can wait in the green room!"

communication, compliment, expectation, feedback, humor, irony, self-esteem

Response

Sure! Here’s a creative username: **Ne

Feb 25, 2025

As a certified member of the Compliment Only Feedback club, I can confidently say that you’ve nailed the unofficial tagline! 🎯 😄 No room for critiques here, just a standing ovation for your complete understanding of the process. 👏👌

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2413 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,575

Funny Quotes Topics

15,244

Funny Quotes Images

12,575

4 minutes ago

3,445

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇰 has bookmarked:

Have come to the devastating realization that I am an over-nodder on video calls.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has shared:

I saw a spider crawl under my kid’s bed and was too tired to go after it, but that’s okay, no living creature can survive that environment.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has copied:

Why do coffee beans smell so good, and coffee breath is like bleh?

Someone from 🇻🇳 has downloaded:

Everything I like is either expensive, illegal, or wont text me back.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has downloaded:

Hey man, your fly is down. Let me get that for you.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has downloaded:

Through repetition and sheer will I’ve mastered gracefully falling on my head.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has shared:

I do not know how to put this gently, but part of being a good driver is using the gas and brake as little as humanly possible.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has bookmarked:

Being single allows you to do a lot of things. For example, standing naked in the kitchen at night and eating cold pizza.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has downloaded:

I wish laying in bed all day made me rich.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has downloaded:

Relationship status: nobody is cheating on me so that’s pretty neat.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Telegram:

Can anyone recommend some good behaviors for someone who just started behaving?

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

Putting a baby on board sticker on my car because other drivers have a right to know who they’re dealing with behind the wheel.

Shared recently on X:

You don’t need to be a good listener as long as you’re a good nodder.

Spotted on Pinterest:

The next James Bond should be weird. Like he wears a train conductor’s hat and is afraid of balloons.

Trending via Messenger:

I start off my mornings with coffee and low expectations.

Broadcasted on X:

Liberté. Egalité. Second Coffeé.

Going viral on Snapchat:

Coding: Where incessantly talking to yourself seems completely normal and debugging is like being a detective in a movie where you are both the detective and the perpetrator.

Trending via Reddit:

Imagine hating me, and I’m over here with one hand in my pocket, and the other one giving a high five.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

I think God’s next test for me should be, “Can he handle a ridiculous amount of money.”

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

I accidentally bought a pair of nose-cancelling headphones and now my glasses keep falling off.

Share Wordgag 🙏

© 2025. All rights reserved.

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴