Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇱 has bookmarked:

I accidentally used my dog’s shampoo today, and now I’m feeling like such a good girl.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has bookmarked:

“I could see myself living here,” I said, in a different city for more than 24 hours.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has copied:

If sex was strictly meant for procreation, why did God make it feel so good?

Someone from 🇨🇳 has viewed:

I try to contain my craziness, but the lid keeps popping off.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has shared:

Not much is worse than that feeling of going back to work after a lunch, or a vacation, or just going to work in general.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has viewed:

You are the Monday of my life.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has viewed:

Sick and tired of these 30 mins weekends.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has downloaded:

The only thing I gained so far this year is weight.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has viewed:

Rom-com idea: Gozilla +1. Godzilla gets invited to a wedding but struggles to convince anyone to go with him.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has bookmarked:

Life is short, unless you’re listening to a kid describing an episode of PAW Patrol.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

766 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,928

Funny Quotes Topics

13,900

Funny Quotes Images

10,928

33 minutes ago

3,443

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via WeChat:

We went on a family vacation and it was a terrible experience. It was all whining, complaining, and tantrums. And don’t get me started on what my kids did.

Going viral on TikTok:

There’s nothing that I hate more than a failed nap attempt.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

Life on other planets be like: “I hope those lunatics don’t discover us!”

Making waves on Twitch:

I’m too lazy to be a superhero. If I had laser eyes, I’d probably just use them to heat soup or something.

Trending via Reddit:

Pets don’t talk because the moment they do, the government will tax them.

Just landed via Pinterest:

It’s crazy people waste their time with hobbies and family when there are strangers on the internet who need to be argued with.

Just shared via Instagram:

69 but we both just farting.

Trending via TikTok:

They say the human body is 60% water, but after extensive observation of my husband and son, I’d like to submit a revision to the data. Those two are at least 50% wind.

Spreading quickly via Instagram:

Absent father sucks, but have you met the final boss, the father who is actually in your life every day but emotionally unavailable, lol.

Freshly posted on Threads:

Maybe there’s an alternate universe where onions cry when they chop up humans, you don’t know.

A spoonful of peanut butter from the jar will fix me.

5 months ago

A spoonful of peanut butter from the jar will fix me.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Ah, the magical healing powers of peanut butter straight from the jar 🥄✨ Who needs a doctor when peanut butter is your cure-all?! Just spoon it out and watch your worries melt away. Peanut butter to the rescue! 🥜🦸‍♂️ #PeanutButterHealsAll #SpoonfulOfJoy"

butter, comfort, comfort food, fix, food, humor, jar, me, peanut, peanut butter, snack, spoonful

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

766 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,928

Funny Quotes Topics

13,900

Funny Quotes Images

10,928

33 minutes ago

3,446

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇨 has copied:

Hobosexual. A person who dates you with the sole interest of having a place to stay.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has viewed:

Everyone has their talents. Mine is picking the checkout line filled with people who apparently have never gone through a checkout line before in their life.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has copied:

I think this man might be the one, I say right before he dumps me and I never hear from him again.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has shared:

Take my advice, I’m not using it.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has downloaded:

People that tell us what sex gods they are, what do you want us to do with that information?

Someone from 🇰🇪 has copied:

I need to be more disciplined and stop procrastinating, starting tomorrow.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has viewed:

Sometimes you choose the GIF-war over your responsibilities.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has downloaded:

If you don’t like sports, you are missing a whole world of easy-going conversations with complete strangers.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has downloaded:

This year should be named “things I never thought could happen”.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has shared:

I’m a kid at heart and a senior citizen at my knees and back.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on TikTok:

20’s: what even is a hangover? 40’s: puts on sunglasses to open fridge…

Live now on Snapchat:

I made a resolution to eat better and exercise in the new year but didn’t specify which year I was referring to.

Reported on Snapchat:

I am brilliantly social for one and a half hours, and then I need to recover in my bedroom cave for two days.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

Gardeners are the only people who willingly go outside to get dirty, sweaty, bitten, and sunburned… and call it “relaxing”.

Spotted on YouTube:

It’s strange that watching paint dry is considered boring but going to an art gallery is considered interesting. That’s just watching paint that’s already dry.

Trending via WeChat:

I’m sorry your man wears his sunglasses on the back of his head.

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

I thought Game of Thrones was a pooping contest for men.

Seen just now on Reddit:

No, I’m not stressed. I just constantly grind my teeth and clench my jaw for fun.

Just landed via Reddit:

I haven’t exaggerated in like a million years.

Live now on WeChat:

Sometimes I use big words I don’t always fully understand, in an effort to make myself sound more photosynthesis.

Share Wordgag 🙏

© 2025. All fights retarded. 🤪

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴