Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇮 has copied:

Childbirth seems like an awful lot of work for an already saturated market.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has viewed:

Shoulda named my daughter Calculus cause damn she’s complicated.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has copied:

I’m already excited about who I’m going to think sucks first today.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has shared:

I’m officially at the age where I hate unnecessary noises and useless friends.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has shared:

Normalize having a threatening aura, but really just being a sweetheart.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has bookmarked:

Look, a three-day weekend is all I ask. The rest can be four-day weekends.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has bookmarked:

Y’all ever postpone an outfit? Like, nah, let me save this for a better day? Same.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has shared:

I just ordered a life alert bracelet, so if I ever get a life, I will be notified immediately.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has shared:

The man who invented autocorrect has died. Restaurant in peace.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has copied:

Banks should have a gold bar that you can go in and touch when you feel poor.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

299 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,568

Funny Quotes Topics

17,624

Funny Quotes Images

15,568

Updated

Jan 11, 2026

Users Online

3,513

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on WeChat:

See you when you get home from school, I whisper to my kid’s apple.

Just shared via Discord:

I don’t remember if I took my pills, but I can’t check because I can’t remember where I put my glasses.

Going viral on Pinterest:

Floating on a rock in space, but yeah – 9 to 5 sounds reasonable.

Spotted on Telegram:

Asking my landlord if he has any Cyber Monday deals.

Spreading quickly via Facebook:

I live in constant fear of being asked to repeat what you just said after I say I’m listening.

Making waves on Slack:

If love is the answer then what was the question?

Shared recently on YouTube:

The best way for me to stick to my diet is to go straight back to sleep after breakfast.

Shared recently on Instagram:

Stores should accept “I bought this while depressed” as a valid reason for a return.

Seen just now on YouTube:

Just because you can connect to your neighbor’s bluetooth speaker and play ghost noises doesn’t mean you should.

Going viral on Snapchat:

I just be minding my business, and next thing you know, a payment is due.

After 25, you’re pretty much 30.

After 25, you’re pretty much 30.
Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Ah, yes, the magical age of 25, where you're basically just a stone's throw away from 30. It's like hitting the fast-forward button on life and realizing you're suddenly closer to retirement than you are to your college days. Time sure does fly when you're busy adulting, doesn't it?"

, , , , , ,

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

99 shares on Telegram this month:

Rehab is a great place to meet people that like Piña Coladas and getting caught in the rain.

83 shares on Messenger this month:

Not sure why I drink anymore. I get the same effect from standing up too fast.

54 shares on YouTube this month:

My bed is a magical place where I suddenly remember everything I forgot to do.

47 shares on Discord this month:

You didn’t get fired, your job “fumbled you”.

16 shares on Twitch this month:

My kids asked me what games I used to play on my iPad as a kid. I told them I used to speak into a fan to sound like a robot.

67 shares on Reddit this month:

He said he thinks I’m resilient to everything, so I thanked him, but on second thought, he may have low key called me a cockroach.

48 shares on Pinterest this month:

I woke up again, it’s pathetic how much death fears me.

99 shares on Twitch this month:

Going down a rabbit hole if anyone wants anything.

36 shares on Slack this month:

When two people argue online I believe whoever spells correctly.

50 shares on Slack this month:

Apartments show you 44 pics of the lobby. Man, I ain’t living in there.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

7 folks are currently checking 👀

The only person I ever call is my wife, and that’s just when we’re trying to find her phone.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

My dog is quite vain. Whenever the doorbell rings, he thinks it’s for him.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m eating sandwiches you haven’t heard of in jeans you can’t pronounce.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Brains are awesome. I wish I had one.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

You’ll be watching a series, and they’ll just randomly start playing the best song you’ve ever heard in your life.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Dogs will go through amazing effort to get a better view of your plate.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Breakups are hard, but have you ever been disappointed in the food you ordered?

10 folks are currently checking 👀

The only problem I have with chocolate is that one minute it’s there and the next it’s not.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

There are risks you take when camping: severe weather, wild animals, someone bringing an acoustic guitar.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

If I buy the circus, the monkey will be the manager.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

299 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,568

Funny Quotes Topics

17,624

Funny Quotes Images

15,568

Updated

Jan 11, 2026

Users Online

3,381

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇹 has shared:

Losing and then immediately gaining weight is my superpower.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has downloaded:

Summer is the best because there’s always a chance I’ll see someone trip on their own flip flop.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has bookmarked:

Be careful when you follow the masses sometimes the M is silent.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has shared:

Farts are just the ghosts of the things we eat.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has bookmarked:

Forget a dinner date, let’s go sit in court listening to people’s cases.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has shared:

I wish I had a pair of skinny genes.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has copied:

I don’t approve of political jokes. I’ve seen what happens when they get elected.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has shared:

I am both dumber and smarter than you think. Do not estimate me.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has downloaded:

A fly swatter, but for close talkers.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has bookmarked:

Signing all emails with BOOM SHAKALAKA today.

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on Threads:

Just flipped my mattress, should have woken up my wife first.

Just landed via Messenger:

“Delusional” ain’t a strong enough word to describe people anymore.

Live now on Facebook:

I saw The Blair Witch Project way too young and it made me afraid of projects.

Shared recently on WeChat:

I realized being an adult is just feeling too tired to function, and then functioning.

Trending via Telegram:

I knew I had issues when motivational speakers started to irritate me.

Going bananas on Slack:

Please respond to the messages I almost sent you.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

One of my biggest fears during a zombie apocalypse is having to sleep without a fan.

Breaking via Snapchat:

It’s only a family vacation if you think “We’re never doing this again” at least once.

Just shared via WeChat:

Being a girl must be so easy. All you do is cry all day and text 10 different guys.

Just shared via TikTok:

The worst thing about having children is the parents of the other children.

© 2026. All rights reserved.

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴