Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇺 has copied:

Some people exercise every day. Right now, I’m watching a show I don’t like because the remote fell on the floor.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has bookmarked:

I had a heated but interesting discussion today and they even agreed with me at the end. That’s exactly why I love talking to myself.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has copied:

Doctors don’t really need to hit you with that rubber hammer, it’s just how they release a lil tension through the day.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has viewed:

It’s hard dating someone who has been single for a long time. Any slight inconvenience, and they’ll crawl back into their peaceful abode. No stress.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has shared:

Life always has it’s ups and downs. I like to up the music, down the drinks, and then relax and enjoy.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has downloaded:

I’m a person who wants to do a lot of things trapped in the body of a person who wants to sleep a lot.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has viewed:

You may think no one is there for you, but there’s laundry. Laundry is always there for you.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has copied:

Sundays are no place for pants or responsibility.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has viewed:

I remember when my boss asked me who is the stupid one, me or him? And I told him everyone knows he doesn’t hire stupid people.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has bookmarked:

I love surprising my metabolism. It never knows what’s coming—either absolute starvation or 1,000+ calories all at once.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Jan 31, 2026

3,642

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on X:

Sometimes I say something so embarrassing I even impress myself.

Just landed via Pinterest:

This post is highly top-secret. You need to forget that you’ve seen it immediately.

Seen just now on Threads:

That awkward moment when someone is doing the dishes, and you slowly put your dish in the sink.

Trending via WhatsApp:

Unfortunately for the both of us, I really like you.

Trending via LinkedIn:

I deserve a treat when I have a bad week, but I also deserve a treat when I have a good week. I simply always deserve treats.

Making waves on Snapchat:

Best tips for saving money: lay down and don’t move.

Seen just now on Discord:

Failed relationships can be described as so much wasted make-up.

Spotted on Telegram:

Don’t be boring. Create the gossip you would like to hear.

Shared recently on Twitch:

At Christmas time, all outstanding invoices are always transferred with the reference “Hohoho”.

Broadcasted on LinkedIn:

If she forgives you, then 30 minutes later comes back mad again: that means she told her friends in her group chat, and the board of directors did not agree.

Anyone else think it’s weird how cancer kills more people than any other astrological sign.

1 week ago

Humorous text about how cancer is the deadliest zodiac sign, playful and witty.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Is it just me, or is cancer really pulling ahead in the zodiac race? ♋️🏁 Who knew an astrological sign could be such a tough competitor in the mortality department! Watch out, Capricorns and Geminis, Cancer is on a roll! 😉🦀

astrological, astrological sign, cancer, death, else, health, humor, irony, people, sign, think, weird, zodiac

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Funny Quotes Collections

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Social Media Stars ⭐

98 shares on TikTok this month:

Cinderella was a mess. I mean, I have bad taste in men, but at least I never settled for a guy who couldn’t remember what my face looked like.

78 shares on YouTube this month:

Not to brag but this cashier is checking me out.

28 shares on WhatsApp this month:

You are not obligated to post a video of yourself dancing.

34 shares on Twitch this month:

If you don’t fall in love with me, I’ll write poetry about you and then you’ll regret it.

22 shares on Discord this month:

Be useless, so nobody can use you.

63 shares on Threads this month:

I’m sorry for the things I said when I was running late due to circumstances completely within my control.

44 shares on Messenger this month:

Coffee ain’t gonna cut it today. I need the blood of my enemies.

41 shares on Instagram this month:

Hate it when my mouth says something my brain was trying to keep quiet.

99 shares on Reddit this month:

People always talk about how they love to sit in their cars for a while once they get home. Whenever I do that, my Uber driver yells at me.

26 shares on Telegram this month:

Overthinking should at least burn calories.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

21 folks are currently checking 👀

I don’t want your hoodie, I want your still-beating heart presented to me in a box.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Your soul is out of balance because you have fallen out of touch with your consumer demographic. Pay more attention to your personalized ads, let them flow through you.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

I’ve been blocked by better.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

You miss 100% of the gossip from the phone calls you don’t answer.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Never eat more than you can lift.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

God ate when he created sleep, what a beautiful concept.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

lol is punctuation and LOL is laugh out loud.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Don’t underestimate your white tee and denim jeans.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

The plant app says that I either watered my plant too much or not enough. Very helpful. Thanks!

24 folks are currently checking 👀

In my 20s: Jingle all the way. In my 40s: Jingle til around ten.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Jan 31, 2026

Users Online

3,332

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇳 has copied:

We decided to have money instead of children.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has bookmarked:

The only thing preventing me from moving to Finland is the language barrier and a job.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has bookmarked:

I love when really expensive products say, “apply generously,” like, of course, you would say that.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has downloaded:

Friends come and go, like the waves of the ocean, but the true ones stay like an octopus on your face.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has viewed:

Gosh, being a princess is exhausting.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has bookmarked:

Your woman will take 2 hours to get ready, but if you don’t have your shoes on when she is ready, you’re the problem.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has copied:

Starting a new life today, bye.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has bookmarked:

I was at the cemetery when a little kid walked up to me and said she was afraid. I took her hand and told her that I used to be afraid too… when I was alive.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has copied:

That awkward shopping moment when someone is standing in front of the items you need and you pretend you’re shopping for something else because they just won’t budge.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has viewed:

Babe, are you OK? It’s already Q4, and you’ve barely touched your “2025 roadmap.”

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on Reddit:

There should be a “Take Your Friend to Work Day,” so we can actually see what our friends do all day and meet the characters from all their work stories.

Spreading quickly via Facebook:

Sometimes being on your phone all day is your destiny.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Might start a YouTube channel “will it hurt if I drop it on my foot”.

Trending via Threads:

I’m still annoyed that you can catch Covid more than once. I can’t explain why, but it feels kind of rude.

Spreading quickly via Telegram:

I wish my wife’s sighs came with subtitles.

Going bananas on LinkedIn:

Don’t worry, better days are coming. They are called Friday, Saturday and Sunday.

Making waves on YouTube:

Men used to go to war, now they drinking matcha.

Freshly posted on Discord:

At my size, I’d be called Buffet the Vampire Slayer.

Going viral on X:

I’m already far too stressed as it is. And then you also have to have time to just sit there and do nothing.

Spreading quickly via X:

Why is nobody questioning the quietness of the cosmos?

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