Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • Halloween candy isn’t bad for you if you keep it in a salad bowl.
  • God: “You’re all a bunch of bastards and I should never have created you.”
  • My future wife is probably fake laughing at her boyfriend’s lame jokes right now. Be patient, Queen, a true clown is on the way.
  • My wheelchair keeps making a screaming noise when I run over people.
  • The meeting of the Anonymous Pessimists was canceled. It wouldn’t have helped anyway.
  • I’m not totally useless. I can be used as a bad example.