Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇬 has shared:

I hate that I’m so indecisive. Actually, I don’t know if hate is the right word.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has shared:

Autumn at last. Sitting on the sofa all day with a blanket and tea and watching movies. Just like in summer, but with a blanket and tea.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has bookmarked:

If being hydrated is such a great thing, why does it feel like my bladder is pissed off?

Someone from 🇸🇹 has bookmarked:

Dogs will go through amazing effort to get a better view of your plate.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has copied:

Do y’all watch the results come or do you go to bed and wait to see what Democracy Claus left you in the morning?

Someone from 🇯🇵 has viewed:

Don’t blame the holidays, you were already overweight in August.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has downloaded:

Hey! (with the intention of going back to sleep)

Someone from 🇧🇪 has viewed:

Just shaved my whole body for Santa.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has copied:

Becoming a man doesn’t happen the first time you fight or make love. It happens the first time you see the gas bill and remind everyone that we aren’t trying to heat the outside.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has copied:

Life is just a series of Sopranos references with some other things mixed in.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,316

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Slack:

Running to the boarding gate is my favorite workout.

Making waves on Instagram:

I’m writing a parenting book called ‘Kids won’t listen until you scream like your mother did’.

Going viral on Twitch:

There should be a calorie refund for food that didn’t taste as good as you expected.

Spotted on Slack:

If Britain is going to be invaded, can it at least be by the Romans? We desperately need the roads resurfacing.

Going viral on WeChat:

If all men are the same, why does it take women so long to choose one?

Going viral on WeChat:

I want a chiropractor to crack my entire body like a glow stick.

Shared recently on Reddit:

Germany is now advising people to stock up on cheese and sausages. This is called the Wurst Käse scenario.

Spreading quickly via Facebook:

Everyone talks about climate change, but no one has the courage to sacrifice a virgin to appease the gods.

Seen just now on TikTok:

I’m not here to make friends, just noise.

Freshly posted on Discord:

Remember: when a band skips your city on tour, it is always personal and they always hate you specifically.

Avoid calls from pesky bill collectors by not paying your phone bill.

2 weeks ago

Funny Quotes

Clever and humorous text about dodging phone calls from bill collectors.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Who needs a phone bill when you have carrier pigeons? 🐦📞 Dodging bill collectors like a pro! 😂💸 #FinancialHacks"

advice, avoid, avoid calls, bill, bill collector, calls, collector, funny advice, humor, phone, phone bill

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Attention to detail is so sexy, study me, baby.

2 weeks ago

attention, attention to detail, baby, confidence, detail, flirtation, humor, me, sexy, study
90% of my thoughts start with: “What can I eat now?”

2 weeks ago

90, cravings, eat, food, humor, hunger, i, start, thoughts
I accidentally said “large” instead of “venti” at Starbucks and now the cops are here.

6 days ago

accident, accidentally, coffee, cops, here, humor, i, joke, large, misunderstanding, police, Starbucks, venti
I was in a good mood until I realized not only was it not Friday it wasn’t even Thursday.

4 days ago

day, disappointment, even, Friday, frustration, good, humor, i, mood, only, realization, Thursday
Passive income? Brothers, I need massive income.

2 weeks ago

brothers, finance, humor, i, income, money, motivation, need, passive, passive income, wealth
I wish people would stop holding back and use social media to tell us how they really feel.

2 weeks ago

back, communication, expression, feel, feelings, holding, honesty, humor, i, media, opinion, people, social, social media, stop, tell, truth, us, wish

Funny Quotes Collections

✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

70 shares on TikTok this month:

You want to go out in the sun and then you can’t get the couch through the door.

82 shares on Messenger this month:

You never realize how many curse words are in a song till you play it for your family.

78 shares on Messenger this month:

Half the world is mentally ill. The other half is to blame.

72 shares on Twitch this month:

If we date and break up, you gotta unlearn all my lingo and cool shit that I taught you. You gotta go back to being lame.

62 shares on Telegram this month:

Polar bears drinking Coca Cola is my favorite holiday vibe.

47 shares on Threads this month:

I only squeak when I’m squoken to.

63 shares on Facebook this month:

29 shares on Reddit this month:

Scratching the mosquito bite on my foot? Literally orgasmic. This is the kind of stuff that the government doesn’t want you to know.

20 shares on Discord this month:

If white men can’t jump, how do you explain Super Mario?

89 shares on Threads this month:

I wonder if people who spend all their time screaming on the internet know there are way more fun things to do.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇬 has copied:

Whoever first said, “It gets to a point,” was definitely at that point, and I feel them deeply.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has copied:

Sometimes I’ll drink a ginger ale and eat a Biscoff cookie and sit up in kind of an unnatural position and pretend I’m on a Delta flight.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has bookmarked:

Every time my kids start whining, I get the urge to call my mom and apologize.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has viewed:

You can add tears while cooking if you don’t have salt.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has bookmarked:

Do I work hard? No. But do I work smart to compensate. Absolutely not.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has shared:

Tears for Fears: Everybody wants to rule the world. Me: Some of us just want eight hours of uninterrupted sleep.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has bookmarked:

Breaking news: you’re way less interesting than you think you are.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has downloaded:

My favorite conspiracy theory is that everything is going to be OK.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has downloaded:

Expiration date? More like spoiler alert.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has downloaded:

(suicidal grindset guy) When I jump, it’s gonna be from the penthouse.

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

Ho, ho, holy shit is Christmas stressful.

Trending via WeChat:

Should we all just give up and get really into drugs? Wait, this is literally what happened in the 60s. That just clicked for me.

Going bananas on Pinterest:

I don’t want to alarm anyone, but my doctor says I have an irreversible terminal condition called aging.

Shared recently on Facebook:

Nearly choked on a carrot. A donut would never do that to me.

Making waves on TikTok:

The Midwest urge to have a drink on a patio as soon as it’s nice out.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

Nothing is more fake than my friendliness on the phone at work.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

If you pick a movie that’s longer than the flight, the pilot gets a notification to fly around for a bit.

Trending via TikTok:

Desperately searching the dating app settings for an option to turn down the difficulty level.

Just shared via Reddit:

It’s time to stare blankly at my wall for hours straight and think about where I went wrong with my life.

Making waves on Messenger:

I changed my alarm clock sound to an applause, it’s the least I deserve for waking up at 7am.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Avoid calls from pesky bill collectors by not paying your phone bill.

Keep the laugh going 😂

Attention to detail is so sexy, study me, baby.

90% of my thoughts start with: “What can I eat now?”

I accidentally said “large” instead of “venti” at Starbucks and now the cops are here.

I was in a good mood until I realized not only was it not Friday it wasn’t even Thursday.

Passive income? Brothers, I need massive income.

I wish people would stop holding back and use social media to tell us how they really feel.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨