Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • When I was a kid I would say I’m whatever age and a half because I wanted to be older. Now I say I turned 40 a few years ago.
  • I wonder if this is all happening because I opened that umbrella inside.
  • I know that we aren’t supposed to self diagnose but I’ve googled all of my symptoms and I’m fairly sure I’m a raccoon.
  • My dental hygienist is probably thinking, I bet i could braid this guys nose hair.
  • It whistles, doesn’t it? Your head when it’s windy.
  • Sorry I’m late, I got here as soon as I wanted to.