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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇨 has viewed:

I’m looking for friends with benefits. And by that I mean friends who have pools, boats and beautiful vacation homes.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has viewed:

I’m not saying I need glasses. But today I watched a bunny in a meadow until it flew away.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has bookmarked:

As a parent you get to see just how much a baby accomplishes in its first year of life. Because you’re awake for all of it.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has viewed:

How long does it take for an apple to turn brown after you cut it? Never mind.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has downloaded:

Do you think the washing machine and the dryer are actual friends or just work friends?

Someone from 🇲🇺 has bookmarked:

I think the world is ready for a fat James Bond.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has downloaded:

I’m not easily offended, but I am easily annoyed.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has viewed:

Welcome to Netflix. We have every movie but the one you actually want to watch.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has bookmarked:

20’s: what even is a hangover? 40’s: puts on sunglasses to open fridge…

Someone from 🇬🇶 has shared:

Sorry for levitating at the end of your bed all night, I just think you’re really cute.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

808 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,970

Funny Quotes Topics

13,933

Funny Quotes Images

10,970

39 minutes ago

3,435

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on X:

People are always saying “not today, Satan” but what if we just hear him out.

Spotted on Snapchat:

That sound when you close the cupboard and hear something fall inside, that’s the sound of somebody else’s problem.

Spreading quickly via Discord:

My car accidentally drove to a burger shop again. I hate when it does that.

Spotted on Discord:

Sometimes I think about Adam and Eve and how they couldn’t even get a babysitter.

Just shared via Twitch:

Oh good. Another day.

Going viral on Pinterest:

Blood pressure too high to chase these hoes.

Making waves on Telegram:

All our dogs think we quit our jobs to spend more time with them. All our cats think we got fired for being lazy.

Trending via TikTok:

Can everyone please turn their A/C off during the day, we need that power to generate images of people with eight fingers.

Trending via Pinterest:

Don’t judge me. I was born to be awesome, not perfect.

Just shared via WeChat:

On the whole, people are getting smarter. I remember when they had to put “The End” on the screen, so people would know the movie was over.

Candy companies will look you straight in the eye and lie about how they know what a banana tastes like.

6 months ago

Candy companies will look you straight in the eye and lie about how they know what a banana tastes like.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Well, well, well 🍌🍭… so apparently candy companies have been living double lives as fruit connoisseurs, huh? 😂 Who knew they had such a keen sense of taste buds when it comes to bananas! Talk about a sweet deception! 🍬🍌🤥

banana, candy, company, eye, food, honesty, humor, know, lie, perception, straight, taste

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

808 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,970

Funny Quotes Topics

13,933

Funny Quotes Images

10,970

39 minutes ago

3,444

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇽 has shared:

The difference between the Olympic village and a normal village is that not everyone in the Olympic village is related to each other.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has bookmarked:

Whoever came up with the spelling for “receipt” was an idiopt.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has bookmarked:

I take issue with furniture that deliberately moves 1 inch when you’re in a rush to get by.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has bookmarked:

A man messaged me on Insta and said, “You are not looking bad.” This might be the one, y’all.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has shared:

The streets are not for me. I belong in an enchanted forest, eating berries, and talking to my animal friends.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has viewed:

You know you’re getting old when you and the grocery store have the same playlist.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has downloaded:

Are you spaghetti because I want you to meat my balls?

Someone from 🇲🇻 has copied:

Looking for someone who loves me as much as some people love standing up the second a plane lands.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has shared:

I think my new neighbors are creeps. They seem to be looking into my window every time I’m looking out my window to see what they are doing.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has viewed:

If I’m gonna jingle your bells, I’m definitely gonna jingle them all the way.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Pinterest:

There is nothing an orgasm can’t fix, I have researched it extensively.

Freshly posted on Slack:

Can’t. Too busy saving daylight.

Broadcasted on WeChat:

That “so we done?” be saving the relationship every time.

Spotted on WeChat:

Facebook should just go back to being Hot or Not dot com.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

I always mean what I say, I don’t always mean to say it out loud, but I always mean it.

Trending via TikTok:

Talking to the stars because people suck.

Trending via YouTube:

You don’t know your own leg strength until you’re kicking the end of a hotel tucked bed sheet.

Broadcasted on Reddit:

My last husband’s name is Don. I just added an E to it and walked away.

Freshly posted on Discord:

I don’t know if I’m pregnant or what, but I’ve been craving 3 million dollars so bad.

Making waves on Pinterest:

My real introduction to classical music came from watching Tom & Jerry cartoons as a kid. Also how I got into sadism.

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