Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇮 has copied:

Every house has a smell that only the people living in it don’t smell.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has shared:

Give us this day our daily internet validation.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has bookmarked:

I noticed my mouse problem is back an I yelled at my cats for being lazy and not doing their job, like I was in a Tom and Jerry cartoon.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has shared:

Being liked at work comes with so many perks, you could be late as hell, and everyone is just happy to see you.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has shared:

When your parents are on a call and they ask for a pen, man, that pressure is real.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has bookmarked:

I know that we aren’t supposed to self diagnose but I’ve googled all of my symptoms and I’m fairly sure I’m a raccoon.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has bookmarked:

I’m a red flag, but the material is quality.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has downloaded:

My therapist is so lucky. I’m like a Netflix Original that pays her to watch.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has bookmarked:

Manipulative birthday text to an ex idea: thank you for loving me briefly in the way that only you could.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has downloaded:

Goodbye, August, don’t let the door hit you on the way out.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Feb 3, 2026

3,676

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

Me, in heaven: Can you take a photo of me sitting on that cloud?

Going viral on TikTok:

You’re an adult if you’re happy every time the mailbox is empty.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

I have many talents, all equally un-monetizable.

Making waves on Threads:

A pet resting their little paw on you is a sign of respect in their culture.

Just landed via Twitch:

The best proof that fairy tales are fictional is the fact that the prince is always an intelligent and handsome single man.

Making waves on WeChat:

My phone screen is brighter than my future.

Broadcasted on Messenger:

Why is it spelled “camouflage” and not “ “?

Just shared via Pinterest:

Has anyone lived long enough to buy a second bottle of Worcestershire sauce?

Live now on Facebook:

When buying presents I like to think, what would Jesus have got you? So yeah, enjoy your fish sandwich.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Years of personal growth can be unraveled in 2 days at your parents’ house.

Ctrl Alt delete my fat.

4 days ago

Funny and cheeky text about using keyboard shortcuts to shed pounds.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Looks like someone's trying to reboot their diet by using the ultimate key combination – Ctrl Alt Delete my fat! If only it were that easy to reset our bodies like a computer system. Perhaps a healthy dose of Ctrl+C for copying gym routines and Ctrl+V for pasting salads into our daily meals might help too!"

Alt, Ctrl, delete, diet, fat, fitness, humor, joke, tech

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Funny Quotes Collections

✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

62 shares on Reddit this month:

Got thrown out of the grocery store for holding a rotisserie chicken up like Simba again.

46 shares on Telegram this month:

I wish people had mute buttons in real life.

56 shares on Threads this month:

If you’re soft, don’t come to my house, cause my kids will roast you.

81 shares on Slack this month:

I am not “quiet quitting”, I am suffering from third-degree burnout.

74 shares on Messenger this month:

Her heart is an abandoned garden filled with ghosts and dying flowers.

10 shares on Twitch this month:

Sorry, can’t. Calling NASA and making alien noises.

85 shares on Telegram this month:

My whole life is basically a blooper reel.

78 shares on WeChat this month:

College is literally just you, your laptop, and your water bottle against the world.

11 shares on YouTube this month:

I personally get offended when rain is referred to as “bad weather.”

22 shares on YouTube this month:

I need something good to watch while I’m on my phone.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Ho, ho, holy shit is Christmas stressful.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Parenting is cheering on your kid’s winning softball team all weekend and then cheering on the Sunday rain for cancelling the rest of the games.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

I was really happy about it being Friday until I realized it was only Wednesday.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

“You look tired”. No, I’m just ugly.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Accepting you’re about to throw up, gotta be the worst feeling on God’s green earth.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Too self-aware for foreplay. I’m so sorry… Take that nurse costume off. I know you didn’t go to med school.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

The best proof that fairy tales are fictional is the fact that the prince is always an intelligent and handsome single man.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Unfollowing high school people really is a form of self-care.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

The ‘b’ in ‘subtle’ totally is.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Touched a tree and accidentally absorbed 400 years of wisdom and 2 squirrel secrets.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,376

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇿🇼 has shared:

I hate interviewing. Just hire me. I stand on business, for real.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has shared:

Not to brag, but my wife just described the dinner I made as “interesting.”

Someone from 🇹🇴 has shared:

Nobody talks about the privilege of having a friend who shows interest in your hyperfixations.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has copied:

I’ve skipped midlife crisis and gone straight to birdwatching.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has shared:

Social media is mental suicide.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has bookmarked:

Instead of meeting any new people, I would much rather un-meet the ones I already know.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has viewed:

Needlenose in HR says we can’t use nicknames anymore.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has viewed:

Thanks to rice cakes, I still can’t imagine nothingness, but now I know what it tastes like.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has shared:

You’re 25, stressing like you’re 40, because you want to be rich before 30, am I right?

Someone from 🇹🇼 has copied:

They should invent a day where it all makes sense.

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Discord:

First time buying fireworks, and I wasn’t sure I’d picked the right ones until the salesman gave me a wink and high-foured me.

Going viral on TikTok:

Not to brag, but what a time to be childless.

Live now on WeChat:

One night stands just make more sense for single people. Why would you need a night stand on both sides of the bed?

Breaking via Reddit:

There should be sympathy cards for having to go back to work after a vacation.

Seen just now on TikTok:

I haven’t even gone to bed yet and I already can’t wait to get home from work tomorrow.

Making waves on Instagram:

I hate having a ton of anxiety and no energy. It’s like having a tank full of gas and no engine.

Live now on Slack:

Saturday Night Fever, but it’s just me yelling, “Five, six, seven, eight!” while my cat lies down and refuses to participate.

Spotted on Threads:

I’ve got a soft heart and a savage mouth. I’m like a Hallmark card written by Gordon Ramsay.

Going bananas on Reddit:

Your honor, my client would like to play on his phone for a little bit

Spotted on LinkedIn:

These aliens are taking forever.

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