Commentary:
Just when I thought I was the only one with a season pass to Crazyland, it turns out it's a full house! 🤪🎢
37 Funny ago quotes
I used to judge cat owners for giving in to their pets’ whims too easily, but holy shit, these animals are relentless and would starve themselves to organ failure just because one time, weeks ago, they had a taste of some ‘better’ food.
Commentary:
😂🐱 Proof that cats are the masterminds behind all major negotiations. They'd rather stage a hunger strike than eat subpar kibble! 🍽️🧠
Just got revenge on someone who wronged me many, many years ago. Never relax, I’m coming.
Commentary:
Years later and still serving up cold dishes 🍽️😎 Revenge isn't a fast food! 🍔⏳
People who don’t have Twitter are trying to show you stuff you laughed at a month ago.
Commentary:
And here I thought I had finally achieved time travel! 🚀😂 #AheadOfTheGame
Sure, you can invite more people to the plans we made 2 months ago. The more, the merrier. Also, I’m not going now.
Commentary:
Sounds like our plans are getting a party upgrade! Too bad I'm switching to ghost mode 👻🎉
It’s funny how everyone who was all about Christmas a week ago is suddenly into New Year’s now.
Commentary:
"Guess everyone's resolutions are to avoid leftover fruitcake! 🥳🎄🎊"
I will trust someone on Reddit from 11 years ago with my life before using ChatGPT for anything.
Commentary:
When you put your faith in the wisdom of the ancient Reddit scrolls, who needs AI? 😂📜🤖
Not to brag, but I boiled the right amount of pasta. Once. Five years ago.
Commentary:
Achievement unlocked: Pasta Whisperer 🥳🍝 #OnceInALifetime
You were promised to me 3,000 years ago.
Commentary:
I guess that makes me fashionably late—time definitely lost my RSVP! ⏳😂
Fifteen years ago, makeup was all powders and dusts. But now, it’s all goo and liquid. From this, I can infer that by 2040, it will all be made of pigmented gases.
Commentary:
The future of makeup: just spritz, shimmer, and sniff your way to fabulous! 💨✨💋