Commentary:
"Looks like the bacon-to-person ratio is a little skewed here 🥓👩👩👩👩 Who knew bacon could multiply you like that? Time to invite some friends over for a crispy and delicious bacon feast! 🥓🎉👯♂️"
158 Funny cooking quotes
“Made with love,” means I licked the spoon and kept using it.
Commentary:
"Remember, 'Made with love' doesn't necessarily mean it's germ-free! 🥄😜 #CookingConfessions"
According to the amount of bacon I just cooked. I’m a family of 8.
Commentary:
"Who knew bacon could be the ultimate indicator of household size? 🥓👨👩👧👦 Better start setting up the extra dinner table and chairs! 🍴🤣 #BaconBlessings #FeedingtheVillage"
A frittata is just an omelette for people too lazy to flip things.
Who knew that the hardest part of being an adult is figuring out what to cook for dinner every single night for the rest of your life.
Commentary:
"Ah, yes, the eternal struggle of adulting – the never-ending dilemma of 'What's for dinner?' Forget climbing the career ladder or paying bills on time, mastering the art of nightly meal decisions is where the true test lies. Who knew that adulthood would be 80% decision fatigue and 20% pretending to have it all together in the kitchen? Bon appétit, fellow adults, may your pantry forever be stocked and your recipe inspiration never run dry!"
I love my new crockpot. Now we can wait longer to eat my horrible cooking.
Making food: 1 hour. Eating food: 20 seconds. Washing dishes: never ending.
Commentary:
"Ah, the eternal cycle of kitchen woes: slaving away for hours to create a masterpiece, only for it to disappear in mere seconds, leaving behind a mountain of dishes that seems to reproduce on its own. It's like a twisted game of culinary whack-a-mole – just when you think you've conquered the kitchen, the dishes pop up again, laughing in the face of your clean plate aspirations."
I hate when I go to the kitchen looking for food, and all I find is ingredients.
Commentary:
"Ah, the classic kitchen dilemma: a pantry full of ingredients and not a ready-made meal in sight. It's like the cosmic joke of adulting – you have the power to create a feast, but all you really want is a snack that magically appears at your command. Bon appétit, or should I say, bon ingredient hunting!"
You can add tears while cooking if you don’t have salt.
Commentary:
"Who needs salt for seasoning when you have a good old sprinkle of tears instead? 😂👩🍳 Just don't forget to stir in some frustration and a pinch of existential crisis for that extra flavor boost! 😉🍳 #ChefsOfTheTears"
I don’t always cook dinner but when I do, I use every pan in the kitchen.
Commentary:
"Ah, the elusive chef who believes in making a grand entrance – not just with the aroma of their cooking, but also with the symphony of clanking pots and pans! Who needs a full kitchen orchestra when you've got this culinary maestro in action?"