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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇭 has downloaded:

How can I be ready for the future when I’m not even ready to get up in the morning?

Someone from 🇸🇷 has downloaded:

Weekends now feel like short commercial breaks in a stressful movie.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has shared:

The answer is a cabin in the woods, by the way.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has downloaded:

I’ve been dieting for a little over a week and I already gained three pounds.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has viewed:

I don’t wish anyone strife in their relationship but I do wish my neighbors would enunciate a little more when they fight so I can hear better.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has bookmarked:

It’s crazy how genuinely entertaining it is to stare into an open fire. That’s some real epigenetic memory shit.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has viewed:

This football season, we need to bring back getting drunk and calling in to your team’s local radio show after the game. Such a lost art.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has viewed:

It’s time for basic human empathy to make a comeback.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has copied:

I love surprising my girl, today she woke up single.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has viewed:

I’m so good at missing early morning meetings, I can do it with my eyes closed.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

676 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Dec 31, 2025

4,052

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

I broke up with the gym. We were just not working out.

Spotted on Discord:

Black Friday used to have heart. I wanna see someone get clocked for a Wii.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

“I asked ChatGPT”. I confided in Amazon. I confessed to McDonald’s. I have an inside joke with Exxon Mobil.

Spotted on Pinterest:

Fact: cats sit on your lap to dominate you.

Spotted on TikTok:

The only team building exercise we had when I started working was called “Happy Hour.”

Spotted on Messenger:

Rise and grind your teeth gently while ruminating over every past mistake.

Live now on Discord:

The good old days, when you didn’t have to charge your watch and it didn’t constantly remind you how fat you were.

Seen just now on YouTube:

Imagine if all the money spent on AI was spent on trains.

Making waves on TikTok:

Not opening up anymore, have fun trying to figure me out.

Going bananas on Slack:

I wish I was born into wealth so I could have a nice 1-bedroom apartment.

Funny dicaprio quotes

Funny dicaprio quotes are the perfect blend of charm and wit that keep us laughing 😂🎬 Whether he’s joking about his iconic roles or sharing quirky moments from Hollywood life, Leo never fails to entertain. Ready to dive into some hilarious gems that show off his playful side? Buckle up for a fun ride through the lighter, laugh-out-loud moments of one of Tinseltown’s favorite stars! 🌟😄 #LeoLaughs

New funny dicaprio quotes 👇

Some woman is out there right now, pregnant with Leonardo DiCaprio’s next girlfriend.

0

2 months ago

celebrity, dicaprio, girlfriend, gossip, humor, joke, leonardo, Leonardo DiCaprio, next, pregnant, right, woman
I totally get why Leonardo DiCaprio is trying to save the environment for future generations. They could be his girlfriend.

0

2 months ago

conservation, dicaprio, environment, future, future generation, generation, generations, girlfriend, humor, i, leonardo, Leonardo DiCaprio, relationship, save, trying
“23 and Me” is how Leonardo DiCaprio RSVPs for events.

0

2 months ago

celebrity, dicaprio, event, genetic, genetic test, humor, leonardo, Leonardo DiCaprio, me, RSVP, test
Being Leonardo DiCaprio is like driving in a school zone. You don’t go above twenty-five.

0

2 months ago

being, caution, celebrity, dicaprio, driving, humor, leonardo, Leonardo DiCaprio, limit, school, school zone, speed, speed limit, zone
Аbsolutely crazy to thіnk that Leonardo DіCaprіo’s future gіrlfrіend іs currently nervous for her fіrst day of kіndergarten.

0

2 months ago

crazy, crazy thought, day, dicaprio, first day, future, future girlfriend, girlfriend, kindergarten, leonardo, Leonardo DiCaprio, nervous, thought

All funny dicaprio quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

37 shares on Snapchat this month:

Why go to the art museum when I can just stare at you?

26 shares on Instagram this month:

The feminine urge to start a coven.

17 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I gave you a follow back, not a Tinder match, don’t “Hey, beautiful” me.

86 shares on Threads this month:

Friends are God’s way of apologizing to us for our families.

38 shares on Twitch this month:

I don’t like to call it a xenomorph — I prefer the term “the alien from Alien.”

35 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Dating apps aren’t working, time to start drinking beer and eating hot dogs along the first base line at a baseball game.

48 shares on Snapchat this month:

I’d like to have a word with the groundhog before he starts working this year.

60 shares on Telegram this month:

If you were the birthday gift I bought my wife some months ago, where would you be hiding?

21 shares on Reddit this month:

It’s that time of year again where I go to random restaurants to tell random women, “So this is why you cancelled our date?”, while they’re out with their significant others.

86 shares on Instagram this month:

If you’re not getting spoiled, then spoil yourself.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

11 folks are currently checking 👀

I was about to organise my closet, but I then I found what I was looking for.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Sure, I could get off the couch today, but then what?

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Of course I wrote a grocery list. I carefully wrote it all down and then didn’t bring it with me, like my mother and her mother before her.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

People moaning and making noise over food makes me so livid I can’t keep it in.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

How would someone cancel an appointment at a sperm bank? Do you just call them and say you can’t come?

25 folks are currently checking 👀

All the observable evidence suggests that, if I was much worse at my job, I’d be more likely to get a promotion to senior management.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

How do I even know this guy is my “boss”? I’ve just been taking his word for it.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

My favorite game is to guess if my headache is due to dehydration, migraine, malnutrition, stress, lack of sleep, poor position, or a brain tumor.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

I would like to see the USA go metric before I die, just so I can enjoy the outrage that would follow.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

If I’m ever in a coma, please pluck my chin hairs.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

676 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,884

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇪🇬 has viewed:

I often message people with the weird idea that they’ll message me back.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has bookmarked:

Carrying my phone from room to room like a Victorian woman and her lantern.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has downloaded:

Is it possible to die of horniness? Asking for a friend.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has viewed:

My dating era has come to an end. I’d like to thank those who participated.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has copied:

I don’t wanna meet your family, bring my plate to the car.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has viewed:

Making friends as an adult is wild because there’s so much lore to catch up on. You’ll be 3 years in and still get random drops like, ‘Oh, by the way, I used to be married.’

Someone from 🇯🇲 has shared:

It’s hard to sleep knowing that cake is in the fridge.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has bookmarked:

That moment when you’ve gone through Insta, Facebook, X and the new emails and you know you should start working now. Luckily, there’s YouTube.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has copied:

My body is like my phone battery. Usually drained by 4pm.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has viewed:

My body feels like it’s aging in dog years.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Reddit:

At the plastic surgeon: Please, Doc, help me. My Barbie doll has appendicitis.

Breaking via Instagram:

That song stuck in my head is “Don’t Speak”; I have no doubt in my mind.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

Hey cell phone companies who play smooth jazz hold music hoping I’ll lose interest and give up: yeah, it’s kinda working.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

When fireworks were invented, it was ‘hisssss’ to ‘wheeeee’ in the making.

Just shared via Snapchat:

50% of parenting is just trying to decide if that noise is worth walking up all of those stairs.

Just shared via YouTube:

I get all the cardio I need by running out of patience.

Trending via Snapchat:

Relationship status: We have changed from “I love you” to “I love YouTube”.

Just landed via Pinterest:

And then there are those dates after which you think: “Have I really shaved my legs for this?”

Making waves on Reddit:

We’re limited only by our imagination and some federal agencies.

Trending via YouTube:

I once quit a job, and when my boss asked why, I simply said, “I hate it here.” Best day of my life.

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