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144 Funny eating quotes

Trending Funny Eating Quotes 🔥

Speed dating, but it’s just me changing tables at a restaurant every few minutes trying a bite of everyone’s food.
Establish dominance by eating a salad in front of your indoor plants.
It is very hard to set aside the time to do your taxes when you are really busy doing other things like eating a snack or looking around the room.
Washing mushrooms is the quickest way to figure out exactly how much dirt you’re okay with eating.
In my 20’s: why is eating healthy such a big deal anyways. In my 40’s: oh.

More funny eating quotes 👇

5 months ago
Share →: Speed dating, but it’s just me changing tables at a restaurant every few minutes trying a bite of everyone’s food.

Commentary:
"Who needs speed dating when you can merrily hop from plate to plate in the ultimate foodie quest for love? 🍝🍔🍣 Swipe right for the perfect dish, or better yet, a slice of every delicious possibility! Bon appétit and bon amour! 💕🍴"
5 months ago
Share →: Subtitles are for when you’re eating chips.

Commentary:
"Subtitles are the unsung heroes of potato chip consumption 🥔📺 Who needs to hear the dialogue clearly when you have the crunchy symphony of chips drowning it out? Important snack priorities, am I right? 😂"
5 months ago
Share →: The sandwich I made for lunch didn’t even make it until 10am.

Commentary:
Looks like that sandwich decided to pull a disappearing act faster than you can say "Abracadabra"! 🥪🎩 Maybe it's off pursuing its dreams of becoming a snack magician! 🧙‍♂️✨ Better luck next time! 😄
5 months ago
Share →: Who would have thought that eating a can of beans would backfire like this?

Commentary:
Well, looks like someone underestimated the explosive power of those innocent looking beans! 💨🔥 Who knew they could turn into such troublemakers? Maybe it's time to bean-sit carefully next time! 😉🌶️
5 months ago
Share →: The way that we’re constantly told not to eat silica gel makes me suspect that it contains all the world’s forbidden knowledge.

Commentary:
"Maybe silica gel is not keeping our snacks fresh, but rather guarding secrets we're not ready to handle 🤫🔮 Maybe the forbidden knowledge it holds includes the secret to perfectly folding a fitted sheet and the ultimate dad jokes collection! Who knew those tiny packets were such troublemakers? 🤔😂 #SnackWars"
5 months ago
Share →: Eating fast food shouldn’t count for calories because it’s not around long enough.

Commentary:
"Who knew fast food could be so sneaky? 🍔🍟 It's like saying 'out of sight, out of mind, out of waistline'! 😂 #CaloriesDisappearFasterThanDriveThruOrders"
5 months ago
Share →: Washing mushrooms is the quickest way to figure out exactly how much dirt you’re okay with eating.

Commentary:
"Because who doesn't love a little extra crunch in their diet for that added 'earthy' flavor? 🍄😂 Just remember, a little dirt won't hurt… hopefully! 😉 #DirtLoversUnite"
5 months ago
Share →: It’s actually quite simple: I don’t want to eat less, I just want to weigh less.

Commentary:
Oh, the eternal struggle of wanting to devour everything in sight but also magically lose weight! 🍔🤷‍♀️ Who needs logic when you can just skip straight to the end result, right? 🤣 #DietDilemmas
5 months ago
Share →: Bruschetta is 80% delicious and 20% mess.

Commentary:
"Bruschetta: the food that leaves you torn between enjoying its deliciousness 🤤 and regretting the aftermath cleaning 🧹. It's a culinary rollercoaster ride! 🍅🥖 #MessyButWorthIt"
5 months ago
Share →: “It’s swimsuit season” I say, eating another swimsuit.

Commentary:
"Ah, the classic swimsuit season dilemma: To wear the swimsuit or eat the swimsuit? 🤔👙🍔 Just making sure I'm well-prepped for all beach activities, right? 😅 #summerbodygoals"