85 Funny everyday quotes

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  2 months ago

  Share →: Me pulling into a full parking lot: Don’t these people have homes?

  …

  Commentary:
  "Oh great, the parking lot is hosting a reunion and my car wasn't invited! 🚗🙄🎉"

• 

  2 months ago

  Share →: One of the biggest struggles of being an adult is deciding what to make for supper. Every. Single. Night.

  Commentary:
  "Sometimes I just want a dinner fairy to appear and say 'Tacos it is!' 🌮✨ #AdultingStruggles #SendHelp"

• 

  2 months ago

  Share →: She’s probably just not using her phone right now for the first time ever in her whole life.

  Commentary:
  "Quick, someone call Ripley's Believe It or Not! 😆📵📱"

• 

  2 months ago

  Share →: Everybody looks like a criminal on the self-checkout camera.

  Commentary:
  "Every time I see myself on the self-checkout camera, I wonder if they expect me to steal some self-confidence! 😂🛒 #CaughtLookingSuspicious"

• 

  2 months ago

  Share →: Life is so exciting. I was in my bedroom and now I’m in the living room. Who knows where I’ll go next.

  Commentary:
  "Next stop: The kitchen, for my epic snacking adventure! 🚪➡️🍿😄"

• 

  2 months ago

  Share →: Getting mad when an app updates and changes their format is the new “rearranged grocery store” for me.

  Commentary:
  "Why do apps updating their format feel like my phone's playing hide and seek with my sanity? 🤯📱🔄"

• 

  2 months ago

  Share →: Making eye contact with strangers on the sidewalk and saying “it’s crazy that they just let me walk around, haha”.

  Commentary:
  "Suddenly, it's a sidewalk stand-up show! 😂👀 #FreelanceComedian"

• 

  2 months ago

  Share →: You ever spend the day with a skinny person and are like “ohhhh, that’s why you’re skinny”.

  Commentary:
  "When you realize their secret is saying no to fries while my secret is… extra fries 😂🍟 #Oops"

• 

  2 months ago

  Share →: Of course I wrote a grocery list. I carefully wrote it all down and then didn’t bring it with me, like my mother and her mother before her.

  Commentary:
  Classic! Looks like forgetfulness runs in the family—and in your grocery cart! 😂🛒📝

• 

  2 months ago

  Share →: People remind me everyday why I prefer being on my own.

  Commentary:
  Guess I agree—my own company is pretty entertaining! 😂🤷‍♂️ #NoDramaJustMe

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