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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇪🇨 has bookmarked:

The most expensive clothing you’ll ever wear is a hospital gown.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has downloaded:

When you want to key his car, but he doesn’t have one, so you bend his bus pass.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has shared:

I hate when people ask me what I meant by something. Listen, I have no idea. I’m as confused here as you are. We’re both learning what I’m about to say at the exact same time.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has copied:

Forget mini pizzas. I want one so big it needs a forklift to rotate it.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has viewed:

The first two drinks don’t count if you have social anxiety, they just turn you into a normal person.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has shared:

Life hack: If you never leave the house you don’t have to worry about running into someone you don’t want to talk to.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has bookmarked:

The ideal girlfriend breaks your heart, so you go on to do great things.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has viewed:

A hammock is a terrible place to receive bad news.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has bookmarked:

Do other people remember toasters with wings flying across our computer screens or was that a fever dream I just had?

Someone from 🇲🇻 has downloaded:

Sleeping in is the most efficient way to find out which morning rituals you can actually do without.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 19, 2026

Users Online

3,407

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on YouTube:

At therapy, saying “Don’t worry about it” to every question.

Spotted on Reddit:

I just learned the professional way to say “I told you so”: “This was identified early on as a likely outcome.”

Shared recently on Twitch:

Software engineers are the dumbest smart people I’ve ever met.

Live now on Twitch:

If these walls could talk, they would definitely say “Wow, this guy really does add cheese to everything after all!”

Going viral on Snapchat:

To be fair, a dumpster is like one of the safest places to have a fire.

Making waves on Twitch:

This is a horrible time in history to be a decent human being.

Just landed via Discord:

The sound of rain outside when you’re in bed is elite.

Breaking via Discord:

Offering someone food, and secretly hoping, they don’t want it.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

My favorite part about having a Peloton is telling people I have a Peloton.

Seen just now on Reddit:

I’ve spent 80% of my adult life resetting my password.

35 Funny humans quotes

Funny humans quotes bring out the silly side of our everyday lives 🤪✨ From awkward moments to quirky habits, these gems capture the hilarious chaos that makes us uniquely human 😂🧠 Ready to laugh at ourselves and share some lighthearted vibes? Let’s dive into the world where humor meets humanity, and smiles are guaranteed! 😄🙌

New funny humans quotes 👇

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All funny humans quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections
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Social Media Stars ⭐

19 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Santa went woke and gave me a small solar panel instead of coal.

39 shares on Twitch this month:

Bedrotting is so nice. Just lying in bed, using your phone comfortably.

41 shares on Telegram this month:

If you ever feel useless, remember that there are bathrooms at pools.

90 shares on X this month:

Due to inflation, you can now eat food that has been on the floor for up to 7.3 seconds.

88 shares on Messenger this month:

Two things I learned yesterday: I’m not too old to sit in a beanbag chair, but I’m too old to get out of one.

80 shares on Telegram this month:

Are you even a parent if you’ve never carried your child out of a store sideways like a surfboard?

74 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Forrest Gump is a haunting film about how long you have to wait for a bus in America.

36 shares on WeChat this month:

But what if I don’t want someone that’s good for me?

55 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Forget Spotify Wrapped. I’m more interested in seeing your Pornhub Wrapped.

48 shares on Instagram this month:

All these self-driving vehicles… It’s only a matter of time before we hear a country song about his truck leaving him.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

15 folks are currently checking 👀

I talk to myself in the same condescending tone, so you’re not special.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Terrible economy to ask a girl what’s wrong.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

What electric cars and diarrhea have in common is the fear of not making it home.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Apartments show you 44 pics of the lobby. Man, I ain’t living in there.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Them: You post a lot. What am I supposed to do here – fold laundry on the timeline?

8 folks are currently checking 👀

True luxury is sleeping until you wake up by yourself.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Almonds are a scam. They are wood. You are eating wood.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Apparently, the job interviewer doesn’t like it when your biggest weakness is beautiful Latinas.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Oh, that gap on my resume is from when I was the architect of my own hell.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

After Michael Jordan joined a religious order, he was known as Air Friar.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 19, 2026

Users Online

3,734

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇻 has viewed:

Men be like: I would love the opportunity to give you the bare minimum.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has copied:

Some of you are out here driving like your turn signal’s free trial ended and you’re all out of blinks.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has downloaded:

The real flex is how many wounds you can turn into wisdom.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has bookmarked:

You can add “cha cha cha” to any sentence you want without explaining yourself. Nobody really appreciates this.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has viewed:

Used dark mode so much that I became physically repulsed when I see a white screen.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has shared:

Need a professional way to say, “I do not care, don’t mention this to me again.”

Someone from 🇧🇫 has copied:

I’m pretty sure by now that we’re some kind of satire channel on some other planet.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has shared:

Sex is fine, but have you ever completed every single thing on your to-do list?

Someone from 🇷🇸 has shared:

If you steal enough FitBits, they’ll just give you one for your ankle.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has copied:

I prefer my weighted blanket in human form.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Snapchat:

Insomniacs who are not afraid of the dark have nighty-night problems but the pitch ain’t one.

Making waves on Snapchat:

Never signed up for a 401k cause there’s no way in hell I can run that far.

Spotted on Threads:

Nobody victim blames more than my oldest son when he’s in trouble for punching his little brother.

Just shared via Facebook:

That’s kind of sexy of you to be a little weird.

Live now on LinkedIn:

Can’t threaten me with screenshots. I’ll get a microphone and say it again.

Trending via TikTok:

I have the sex drive of a potato.

Shared recently on Facebook:

My rapper name would be 2 stressd.

Trending via Pinterest:

I wish the homes of all my friends were connected to mine by secret underground tunnels.

Broadcasted on Instagram:

What part of “hiii” do you not get? I’m in love with you.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

If I walk into a girl’s house and she got like 50 plants, I know she’s a keeper because she already takes care of a bunch of useless things. What’s one more?

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