Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇨 has downloaded:

Viewing everyone’s stories like the morning paper.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has copied:

Turns out that ending meetings with “have the day you deserve” has made me some enemies at work.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has downloaded:

I’m not flirting with you. I’m just funny and you think you like me.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has copied:

Sometimes I do random acts of kindness, like keeping my mouth shut, for example.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has bookmarked:

What must a pancake think when it’s being flipped? Doubtless something jolly.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has downloaded:

How dare this person in traffic hold me up for seconds on the way to a place that doesn’t require my immediate presence?

Someone from 🇹🇲 has copied:

Have you ever just restarted the dryer because you didn’t feel like folding the clothes yet?

Someone from 🇳🇬 has viewed:

Clueless but committed – that’s my vibe.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has viewed:

Just got hired at Five Guys as the guy who punches the burger before they put it in the bag.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has copied:

Adulting is realizing you can’t skip work like you skipped school.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,613

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via WeChat:

Autocorrect has become our worst enema.

Making waves on Reddit:

I miss when there were so many episodes of every show that they all eventually did one where it was hot, and the air conditioning went out.

Seen just now on Reddit:

Could you set a lightsaber on low and use it as a back scratcher?

Making waves on WeChat:

I’m not saying it’s been a while, I’m just saying I completely blanked on the name of my gym.

Live now on Threads:

When my nudes go to the cloud, I always hope God is impressed.

Breaking via Pinterest:

The only thing I know about AI is, it desperately wants us to have more fingers.

Spotted on Reddit:

Going to all the Halloween parties this year as the Invisible Man.

Making waves on X:

In general, I like company, but not when I am with my pizza.

Making waves on X:

I’m gonna put “CEO of Blockbuster Video” on my resume because who are they gonna call to confirm?

Making waves on Instagram:

As a Dad, you always want your kids to be prepared for real life, that’s why trolling them is so vital.

Funny humor about unused items quotes

New funny humor about unused items quotes 👇

Wow, this is a really nice, sturdy box. I should keep it in the attic for the next 20 years.

4 weeks ago

20, attic, box, humor, humor about unused items, i, items, keep, long-term, next, nice, preservation, sarcasm, should, storage, unused

All funny humor about unused items quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

47 shares on Pinterest this month:

Stop checking your phone every minute. No one loves you.

83 shares on Instagram this month:

Please respond to my telepathic messages.

72 shares on Pinterest this month:

Pluck a single eyebrow hair in 1994, and it never grows back. Pluck a single chin hair today, and it’s back with five friends by 6 p.m.

98 shares on Slack this month:

Pretty sure the best place to hide a dead body is in a new tab you opened to read later.

41 shares on Telegram this month:

Where do I see myself in 5 years? I don’t even know where I am right now.

19 shares on WeChat this month:

Appliances always know when you’re getting a tax refund.

16 shares on Reddit this month:

While you were rotting and wasting your life away, I was doing the exact same thing.

57 shares on TikTok this month:

The question “how is work” really pisses me off. Work is work, bro, I don’t know what else you want me to say.

20 shares on Reddit this month:

Girls are perverts when they like you.

23 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I can melt an ice cube just by staring at it. It takes a while, but I can do it.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇿 has bookmarked:

I told a joke to my boss, and he must have found it really funny because now I get to tell it to HR.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has downloaded:

If you ask him what he admires most about a woman and he says brains, you’ve got yourself a zombie.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has copied:

I was going to go for a run, then realized I could just run my mouth on here.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has downloaded:

My ex texted me saying, “Hey, I miss you,” so I replied, “Sorry, I have zero bars — the past doesn’t have good reception.”

Someone from 🇦🇹 has copied:

Accidentally said I was on a diet instead of in a calorie deficit, and now everyone knows I’m from the 1900s.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has bookmarked:

There’s no filter on my pics or my thoughts. I’m just out here raw-dogging it.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has viewed:

Alexa, take responsibility for my actions.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has viewed:

The nice thing about getting older is that you don’t even have to be drunk to fall in the bushes.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has bookmarked:

Hey, you wanna come to a wedding with me? You could be the groom.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has viewed:

I’m in a comfy dress today, but I look like a potato in floral. Call me Nelly Flortato.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Facebook:

Parents will give you a lecture about fake friends and then get scammed by their own siblings.

Seen just now on Slack:

Candy companies will look you straight in the eye and lie about how they know what a banana tastes like.

Making waves on Pinterest:

If I was pregnant and people asked when I was due, I would say “What do you mean?”

Just shared via YouTube:

On the whole, people are getting smarter. I remember when they had to put “The End” on the screen, so people would know the movie was over.

Just shared via Reddit:

The Welsh language was invented by a dad losing at Scrabble.

Going bananas on Messenger:

Work for a living? In this economy?

Making waves on Telegram:

Adult peer pressure is seeing your neighbor mow his lawn.

Breaking via Telegram:

Being an adult is crazy. Because what the hell is going on?

Freshly posted on WeChat:

Good things happen when you smile or when you’re naked.

Trending via Reddit:

I really don’t care what happens to me romantically anymore.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Funny humor about unused items quotes

New funny humor about unused items quotes 👇

Wow, this is a really nice, sturdy box. I should keep it in the attic for the next 20 years.

All funny humor about unused items quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨